Since the day we were married Charles and I have never openly quarrelled.
He is really good: he spends his evenings at home and does not seem to
desire entertainment elsewhere. He likes to see me well-dressed and does
not stint in house expenditure, although he examines it carefully and
pays a good many of the bills himself by cheque. He has been promoted to
be manager of the bank, and takes up his new duties to-day. Mrs.
Perkins, whose husband is one of the partners, told me that he had said
that there is nobody in the bank equal to Charles for sound sense and
business ability; that everything with which he has to do goes right; he
is always calm, never in a hurry, and never betrayed into imprudence.
This I can well believe. As you know, Jim asked him a month ago in much
excitement for advice about Fordham, who owed him £200. Jim had heard
there was something wrong. Charles put the letter in the desk and did
not mention it to me again till a week afterwards, when he asked me to
tell Jim the next time I wrote to Blackdeep that he need not worry
himself, as Fordham was quite safe. It is certainly a comfort to a woman
that her husband is a strong man and that he is much respected by his
employers. Of what have I to complain? O mother, life here is so dull!
This is not the right word; it is common, but if you can fill it up with
my meaning, there is no better. It will then be terrible. There is
hardly a flower in the garden, although not a weed is permitted. The
sooty laurels unchanging through winter and summer I hate. Some flowers
I am sure would grow, but Charles does not care for them. Neatness is
what he likes, and if the beds are raked quite smooth, if the grass is
closely shaven and trimmed and not a grain of gravel in the path is
loose, he is content. He cannot endure the least untidiness in the
house. If papers are left lying loosely about, he silently puts them
evenly together. He brings all his office ways into the dining-room; the
pens must never be put aside unwiped and the ink-bottles must be kept
filled to a certain height. We do not get much sun at any time of day in
Homerton, and we face the west. Charles wishes the blinds to be drawn
when it shines, so that it may not fade the curtains. We have few books
excepting Rees’s cyclopædia, and they are kept in a glazed case. If I
look at one I have to put it back directly I have done with it. I saw
this place before I was married, but it did not look then as it looks
now, and I did not comprehend how much Blackdeep was a part of me. The
front door always open in daytime, the hollyhocks down to the gate, the
strawberry beds, the currant and gooseberry bushes, the lilacs, roses,
the ragged orchard at the back, the going in and out without ‘getting
ready,’ our living-room with Jim’s pipes and tobacco on the mantel-shelf,
his gun over it, his fishing-tackle in the corner—I little understood
that such things and the ease which is felt when our surroundings grow to
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