Mornings at Bow Street: A Selection of the Most Humorous and Entertaining Reports which Have Appeared in the 'Morning Herald'Wight, J. (John)
General
Mornings at Bow Street: A Selection of the Most Humorous and Entertaining Reports which Have Appeared in the 'Morning Herald'
Wight, J. (John)
Crime -- England -- London
The young gentleman, whose name we understood to be Henry Augustus
_Jinks_, was proceeding to his studies in _quadrilling_ at the dancing
academy, in Pickett-place, Temple Bar, about nine o'clock in the evening;
and being thinly clad, in silken hose, and all that, he was hurrying along
to keep himself warm and in proper quadrilling condition. Whilst he was so
hurrying along, with his head full of fiddles and new figures, he heard
somebody behind him cry "Stop!" and looking back, he saw Mr. Solomon Dobbs
waddling after him. Mr. Henry Augustus Jinks had no idea that the cry of
such a queer-looking man could be addressed to him, and so he continued to
run on; but Mr. Solomon Dobbs still waddled after him, exclaiming "Stop
him! stop that thief!" &c. though in such a thick husky voice that nobody
noticed him. Neither did Mr. Henry Augustus Jinks notice him, but ran on,
and on, till he arrived at the assembly-room; and the first
quadrille--which had been only waiting for him--was just about to be led
off, when in waddled Mr. Solomon Dobbs, and seizes Mr. Henry Augustus
Jinks by his quite clean, fresh-starched cravattery! to the great terror
of the ladies, the indignation of the gentlemen, the silencing of the
fiddlers, and total disarrangement of the quadrille! This was shocking
enough in all conscience; but how was the terror and indignation increased
when Mr. Solomon Dobbs, still holding the astonished Mr. Henry Augustus
Jinks by his clean cravat, told him in plain terms that he was a
_pickpocket_, and had robbed him of his watch! It was too much. The ladies
squealed, the gentlemen stormed, the fiddlers bagged their _cremonas_, and
Mr. Henry Augustus Jinks threatened an action of slander; but the master
of the ceremonies, more judiciously, ran for a watchman, and Mr. Solomon
Dobbs was carried off to the watch-house as a dangerous and evil-minded
_disorderly_.
The magistrate called upon Mr. Solomon Dobbs for an explanation of his
strange conduct.
"----And please your worship, I was not so sober as I might have been,"
solemnly replied Mr. Solomon Dobbs, with an owl-like twinkle of his
gin-quenched eyes.
"Had you any ground for the charge you made against this young gentleman?"
asked the magistrates.
"Your worship, I had not; and I really have no recollection of having done
what is laid to my charge," replied Mr. Solomon Dobbs, in deep
despondency.
"Then, by your own confession you are a drunken fool," responded his
worship.
Mr. Solomon Dobbs bowed assent.--Mr. Henry Augustus Jinks said he was
satisfied, and the matter was dismissed.
OYSTER EATING.
A law student was brought up from St. Clement's watch-house, to which
place he had been consigned between eleven and twelve on the preceding
night, at the suit of an ancient oyster-woman of that parish.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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