Motherhood and the Relationships of the SexesHartley, C. Gasquoine (Catherine Gasquoine)
Philosophy
Motherhood and the Relationships of the Sexes
Hartley, C. Gasquoine (Catherine Gasquoine)
Mothers; Sex; Women -- Social and moral questions
I must, however, reaffirm my opinion that sexual relationships, whether
within marriage or outside of it, whether legal or free, can never safely
be unregulated, and will always be a difficult experiment. And experience
has forced on me the knowledge that the most passionate union is often
the one most likely to end in disaster. For Buckle is not far from right
when he says we accumulate knowledge, but do not progress in morals,
which depend on the unaltered heart of man.
Some characters are manifestly and essentially unfaithful, self-seeking,
and regardless of the happiness of others in love and in all the affairs
of life. Others again act unfaithfully through weakness or haste, or
through the misfortune of circumstances. The mistake with many of these
people is that they ever bind themselves in permanent unions. We should
not condemn or deal harshly with them, for by so doing we drive them to
undertake obligations which they do not, because they cannot, fulfil. In
my opinion, it is foolishness to pretend that for the whole of sexual
conduct there can ever be one fixed rule. We shall have more morality,
not less, if we accept this.
It is for this reason that I am altogether persuaded of the need of much
greater facilities of divorce than exist at present: divorce on the
ground of mutual consent, and based on inability through any cause to
maintain true partnership in marriage.
There are some men and also women unsuited for marriage and quite
undesirable as life-partners; they are not, however, undesirable because
of the legal bond, but because of certain qualities which as individuals
they possess. And this wider facility of divorce would do very much to
lessen individual hardships, and moreover it would cleanse, in a way not
sufficiently recognised, the immorality which is present in many unions.
Marriage, with its fixed duties and the restrictions it does impose, in
particular, upon the woman, will always appear to some a bondage from
which they will seek the quickest way of escape. If no honourable way
is allowed to them, they will take a dishonourable course. This may be
deplored, it cannot (at any rate under existing conditions of character
and public opinion) be helped, and nothing but evil can follow by
pretending it is not so.
Thus we find that the difficulty of divorce is the strongest factor that
brings disgrace and immorality into marriage.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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