Motherhood and the Relationships of the SexesHartley, C. Gasquoine (Catherine Gasquoine)
Philosophy
Motherhood and the Relationships of the Sexes
Hartley, C. Gasquoine (Catherine Gasquoine)
Mothers; Sex; Women -- Social and moral questions
With the decay of the specific traditions of the ideal of womanhood
the idea of a general culture, neither male nor female, has tended to
prevail. We touch here the deep roots of the evil. And what I wish to
make plain is the inevitable failure of an educational system which
makes no kind of arrangement for the special care and training of girls
during the most critical years of their growth. There is, I allege, in
all our educational establishments a strange and most culpable lack
of understanding of the nature of the girl and her functions as a
woman. They model brains without proper consideration of bodies, and
with frightful convention repress from the seeking young the realities
of love, and treat as secret, almost as something to be ignored, the
functions connected with a girl’s sexual life.
The mistake here is so far-reaching that I find it difficult to write
calmly. For again I must assert that what we are doing is really to teach
our girls a shameful denial of their womanhood. I wish that the power of
my pen was stronger, so that I might bring a stinging consciousness of
all the terrible mischief that is being done to the knowledge of every
mother and every teacher.
How many of us have ourselves suffered? But our memories are strangely
short. We forget, in our complacence and lazy, vicarious optimism, the
dark places that imprisoned our young growing souls, haunts of gloom
and despair that were never lit by a ray of sympathetic enlightenment
from our sadder and wiser, but so forgetful, elders. We forget the
grievous wounds to our self-respect. We forget the duality of soul; those
oscillations between fear and disgust and curiosity and desire, with,
perhaps, furtive trembling concessions to a power we did not understand,
to be followed by morbid reactions of loathing, both of the mysterious
impulse and of ourselves, that survive in those deadly disharmonies that
are beginning to engage the attention of modern psychologists, and act
to-day in our adult consciousness to war with the sum of unity which is
happiness.
Yes, we all have forgotten. Yet none the less has this shameful early
struggle left us fettered and seeking, and we have no window to inform us
we are in prison. It has warped our natures, till, when in after years we
look at Love, we behold, not the shining impersonation of the Life-force,
but seeing double, view a monstrous Siamese twin of two figures, Lust
and Sentimentality, a satyr bound to a wan angel by a navel-cord of
procreative necessity. And often there is no rest, no cessation from a
conflict that has left us helpless, so that for us love is moulded round
a core of diseased desires.
It makes us examine our hearts. Is it to be so for ever?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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