In effect, we hardly yet know the psychology of sorrow, which is as
deep, as complex and as worthy of study as the passions to which
we devote so much of our time. In everyday life, it is true, great
sorrows, though not so rare as we could have wished, were nevertheless
too widely scattered for us to study them easily, step by step. To-day,
alas, they are the ground of all our thoughts; and we are learning
at last that, even as love or happiness or vanity, they have their
secrets, their habits, their illusions, their sophistries, their dark
corners, their baffling mazes and their unforeseen abysses; for man,
whether he love or rejoice or weep, remains ever constant to himself!
It is not true, as we too willingly agree, that, since unhappiness
must be known sooner or later, our only duty is to reveal it at the
earliest moment, for the sorrow that is yet green is very different
from the sorrow that is already fading. It is not true, as we admit
without question, that anything is better than ignorance or uncertainty
and that there is a sort of cowardice in not forthwith announcing the
bad news which we know to those whom it must prostrate in the dust. On
the contrary, cowardice lies in ridding ourselves of the bad news as
quickly as we may and in not bearing its whole burden, secretly and
alone, as long as we are able. When the bad news arrives, our first
duty is to set it apart, to prevent it from spreading, to master it as
we would a malefactor or a stalking pestilence, to close all means of
escape, to mount guard over it, so that it cannot break forth and do
harm. Our duty is not merely, as the best of us and the most prudent
seem to believe, to usher in the bad news with a thousand precautions,
with short and muffled, sidelong and measured steps, by the back-door,
into the dwelling which it is to devastate; rather is it our duty
definitely to forbid its entrance and to have the courage to chain it
in our own dwelling, which it will fill with unjust and insupportable
reproaches and upbraidings. Instead of making ourselves the easy echo
of its cries, we should think only of stifling its voice. Each hour
that we thus pass in restless and painful intimacy with the hateful
prisoner is an hour of suffering which we accept for ourselves and
which we spare the victim of fate. It is almost certain that the
malignant recluse will end by escaping our vigilance; but here the very
minutes have their value and there is no gain, however small, that we
are entitled to neglect. The hour-glass that measures the phases of
sorrow is much finer and truer than that which marks the stages of
pleasure. The time that passes between the death of one whom we love
and the moment when we hear of his death is as full of pain as it is
of days. Most to be feared of all is the first blow of misfortune;
it is then that the heart is smitten and torn with a wound that will
never heal. But this blow has not its shattering and sometimes mortal
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