Mr. Jervis, Vol. 2 (of 3)Croker, B. M. (Bithia Mary)
History
Mr. Jervis, Vol. 2 (of 3)
Croker, B. M. (Bithia Mary)
British -- India -- Fiction; India -- History -- British occupation, 1765-1947 -- Fiction; Mate selection -- Fiction
Mrs. Langrishe and Mrs. Brande’s khansamahs--who were at the head
of affairs--were deadly rivals. Mrs. Langrishe’s man wished to be
leader (like his mistress); he laid down the law, and he ordered every
one’s coolies and servants to place themselves under his directions.
“Instead of being quiet and shamed, as he ought to have been, the--the
nouker” (_i.e._ servant) “of a mem sahib who only sent empty plates.”
This was the idea of Mrs. Brande’s khansamah, and to his opinion he
gave loud and angry utterance. A desperate quarrel ensued. He said
the lunch was to be sent to one place--Mrs. Brande’s man declared as
emphatically that it was to be despatched to another. The latter was
the most powerful, and carried his point, and what was worse, carried
all the other servants and coolies away with him! At this moment they
were carefully laying out a really excellent repast, at a favourite
rendezvous, exactly seven miles on the other side of Shirani, and
twelve from the present hungry company.
Mrs. Langrishe’s fare--yes, it had leaked out--was all that was to be
set before them!
Some people were extremely angry. Colonel Sladen, who had valued his
thirst at ten rupees--not that any one was anxious to purchase it--was
really almost beside himself! Sir Gloster, though he _was_ in love,
looked desperately glum. “Ben” Brande, I must honestly confess, was
visibly disappointed. Dry bread and salad were not in his line, and he
had affectionate recollections of a delicious smell from his mistress’s
cook house. Some people laughed--Honor and her companion were amongst
the most hilarious.
Mrs. Langrishe was shown in her true colours for once, and had retired
into somewhat mortified retreat under a neighbouring rock. Mrs. Brande
was overwhelmed. “Where,” she asked with tears in her voice, “was her
khansamah? Where were her raised pies, her Grecian salad, her iced
asparagus?” But though her hospitable soul was vexed, she was not sorry
that her rival’s generous share should be thus set forth before every
eye.
The party, on the whole, took this unparalleled catastrophe uncommonly
well. They ate dry bread (with or without salt), drank water, and wound
up with lettuces. Afterwards the men smoked themselves into complete
serenity. If there had only been tea, but, alas! the tea had followed
the infamous example of the champagne.
Naturally such a lunch had not taken long to despatch. What was to be
done? How was the next empty hour to be put in?
And here Miss Lalla Paske came forward, and threw herself into the gap.
In after days, her aunt always credited Lalla with _one_ good action.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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