As for the Frenchman, 'is meffods at times was reelly serprising. After that first drive Chawley lade 'isself down flat when 'is hemployer drove, but even in that posishun it didn't seem 'ardly safe. That long, thin, bendy driver sent the ball to all 'ites and all angels, but never once in a strate line. After a wile 'e diskarded it, and guv a fair, 'onnest trial to every club in 'is bag in turn. I should never 'ave been serprised to see 'im drive desperit like wiv 'is putter, but even then Chawley wouldn't 'ave dared say nuthink. 'E was quite a plessant, jentlemanly little man, but it didn't do to argue wiv 'im. 'E begun to scream and stamp at once, and Chawley saw pretty soon that it was best and safest to let 'im play 'is own game. It was on the fiftienth green that the great match was ended. Mister Giggington's pluck and stamminer 'ad been amasing for 'is age, but the strane and the joyfull egsitement was beginning to tell on 'im. The Frenchman tried to bring off a thirty-yard putt to save the 'ole, and failed by some forty yards. But 'e took 'is defeet like a nero. They shook 'ands on the green and 'e said that it warmed 'is 'art to reflect on the glory that 'is frendly foe 'ad won. I beleeve as 'ow there was tears in the old jentleman's eyes. 'E turned to me and I quite thort 'e was going to grasp my 'and, but instead of that 'e put a bob into it which was pretty near as good. 'E 'll never make a golfer, but 'Enery Wilks will allus be pleesed and proud to gide 'im rarnd the course. * * * * * [Illustration: A RULING PASSION.--_Mr. Meenister MacGlucky_ (_of the Free Kirk, after having given way more than usual to an expression "a wee thing strong"--despairingly_). "Oh! Aye! Ah, w-e-el! I'll hae ta gie 't up!" _Mr. Elder MacNab._ "Wha-at, man, gie up gowf?" _Mr. Meenister MacGlucky._ "Nae, nae! Gie up the meenistry!"] * * * * * [Illustration: A POSER.--"Farmers always grumbling? Well, supposin' your pigs were down wi' th' fever, an' your sheep had got th' influenza, if your crops were drownded in eighteen inches o' water, an' your rent were overdue--what would you do?" "I? I'd give it up and start a golf club!"] * * * * * [Illustration: INGRATITUDE _Brown._ "Why doesn't Walker stop to speak? Thought he knew you!" _Smith._ "Used to; but I introduced him to the girl he married. Neither of them recognises me now!"] * * * * * GOLF (_As "Put" by D. Crambo Junior._) [Illustration: "Putting" on the "links" The "tee" and the "caddie" A showy manner of handling the "clubs" A full drive A beautiful "iron" shot The "spoon" The "cleek" "Holed out"] * * * * * [Illustration: A MORNING PERFORMANCE] * * * * * [Illustration: FORE! "Now, sir, be judge yourself, whether I in any just term am affin'd to love the Moor."