_The Soldier Doll_ } By the Two ARMSTRONGS. _The Sailor Doll_ } SCENE--_A Nursery. Enter_ Miss JENNY _and_ Miss POLLY, _who perform a blameless step-dance with an improving chorus_. Oh, isn’t it jolly! we’ve each a new dolly, And one is a Soldier, the other’s a Tar; We’re fully contented with what’s been presented, Such good little children we both of us are! [_They dance up to a cupboard, from which they bring out two large Dolls, which they place on chairs._ _Miss J._ _Don’t_ they look nice! Come, Polly, let us strive To make ourselves believe that they’re alive! _Miss P._ (_addressing_ Sailor D.). I’m glad you’re mine. I dote on all that’s nautical. _The Sailor D._ (_opening his eyes suddenly_). Excuse me, Miss, your sister’s more _my_ sort o’ gal. [_Kisses his hand to_ Miss J., _who shrinks back, shocked and alarmed_. _Miss J._ Oh, Polly, _did_ you hear? I feel so shy! _The Sailor D._ (_with mild self-assertion_). _I_ can say “Pa” and “Ma”--and wink my eye. [_Does so at_ Miss P., _who runs in terror to_ Miss J.’s _side_. _Miss J._ Why, both are showing signs of animation. _Miss P._ Who’d think we had such strong imagination! _The Soldier Doll_ (_aside to the Sailor D._). I say, old fellow, we have caught their fancy-- In each of us they now a real man see! Let’s keep it up! _The Sailor D._ (_dubiously._) D’ye think as we can _do_ it? _The Soldier D._ You stick by me, and I will see you through it. Sit up, and turn your toes out,--don’t you loll; Put on the Man, and drop the bloomin’ Doll! [_The_ Sailor DOLL _pulls himself together, and rises from chair importantly_. _The Sailor D._ (_in the manner of a Music-hall Chairman_)-- Ladies, with your kind leave, this gallant gent Will now his military sketch present. [Miss J. _and_ P. _applaud_: _the_ Soldier D., _after feebly expostulating, is induced to sing_. _Song, by the_ Soldier Doll. When I used to be displayed, In the Burlington Arcade, With artillery arrayed Underneath. Shoulder Hump I imagine that I made All the Lady Dolls afraid, I should draw my battle-blade From its sheath, Shoulder Hump For I’m Mars’s gallant son, And my back I’ve shown to none, Nor was ever seen to run From the strife! Shoulder Hump! Oh, the battles I’d have won, And the dashing deeds have done, If I’d ever fired a gun In my life! Shoulder Hump! _Refrain (to be sung marching round Stage)._ By your right flank, Wheel! Let the front rank kneel! With the bristle of the steel To the foe. Till their regiments reel, At our rattling peal, And the military zeal We show! [Illustration: “Shoulder Hump!”]