[Illustration: AT THE ZOO.--_Little Girl_ (_after seeing many queer beasts_). "But there aren't _really_ such animals, nurse, are there?"] * * * * * [Illustration: AT THE CHRISTMAS PARTY.--_Uncle George._ "Don't over-eat yourself, Jimmy, my boy. I never did when I was your age." _Jimmy_ (_sotto voce_). "When did you begin, then?"] * * * * * [Illustration: AN EARLY PURITAN _Bobby_ (_who sees his mamma in evening dress for the first time, and doesn't like it_). "I'll write and tell papa!"] * * * * * [Illustration: _Gertie._ "Oh, Mr. Brown, papa says that Mrs. Brown leads you by the nose. Is that why it's so long?"] * * * * * [Illustration: AT A CHRISTMAS JUVENILE PARTY.--_Aunt Florence._ "I will find you a partner, Ethel, dear. Between ourselves, now, have you any choice?" _Miss Ethel._ "Well, auntie, I should prefer one with a _moustache_!"] * * * * * [Illustration: A CRY FROM THE HEART.--_Little Dunce_ (_looking up suddenly from her history book_). "Oh, mummy, darling, I _do_ so wish I'd lived under James the Second!" _Mamma._ "Why?" _Little Dunce._ "Because I see here that education was very much neglected in his reign!"] * * * * * [Illustration: A BIG PILL.--"What is it, my pet?" "Oh, mum--mummy--I dreamt I'd sw-swallowed myself. Have I?"] * * * * * [Illustration: _Hostess._ "What would you like to eat, Effie?" _Effie._ "Cake." _Mother_ (_reprovingly_). "Effie! Effie! What is the word you've forgotten? Pl----" _Effie._ "Pl--um!"] * * * * * OVERHEARD AT THE ZOO.--(_A fact._)--_Small child_ (_pointing to the hippopotamus_). Oh, mother, look at that big frog going to have a bath! _Better-informed parent._ That isn't a frog, yer silly. It's a crocydile! * * * * * INFANT AGONIES.--_Small boy._ Auntie! Auntie! Has goosegogs got legs? _Auntie._ No! _Small boy._ Boo-hoo-hoo! then I've been and swollered--a beastie! * * * * * INADEQUATE HOSPITALITY.--"Well, Guy, did you enjoy the party?" "Yes, mummy; but I'm _so_ hungry. There was only a _now and then_ tea, you know; with no chairs, and no grace!" * * * * * NATURE'S LOGIC.--_Papa._ How is it, Alice, that _you_ never get a prize at school? _Mamma._ And that your friend, Louisa Sharp, gets so many? _Alice_ (_innocently_). Ah! Louisa Sharp has got such clever parents! * * * * *