"And is that all!" she asked him. "Is there no other course?" She
leaned towards him, and her lips were parted slightly. For a moment or
two he watched the slow rise and fall of her bosom, and then with a
short, hard laugh he turned away.
"You want a lot for your money, my lady," he said, and his voice shook a
little. "But I will paint you another picture, before we drift through
the branches back to the boat-house and--reality. I see another
house--just an ordinary nice comfortable house--four reception, ten bed,
h. & c. laid on, with garage. Close to good golf links. A girl in grey
is standing in the hall, leaning over a pram in which the jolliest,
fattest boy you've ever thought of is sitting and generally bossing the
entire show. He is reputed by his nurse, who is old enough to know
better, to have just spoken his first consecutive sentence. To the
brutal and unimaginative father who is outside with his golf clubs it had
sounded like 'Wum--wah!' According to the interpreter it meant that he
wanted an egg for tea; and it was being duly entered up in a book which
contained spaces for Baby's first tooth, the first time he was sick, when
he smashed his first toy--and other milestones in his career. . . . Ah!
but it's a jolly house. There are no crowds of men-servants and
maid-servants; there is no priceless Limousine. And the girl just wears
a grey silk jersey with a belt, and a grey skirt and grey brogues. And,
ye Gods! but she looks topping, as she steps out to join the brutal man
outside. Her golf clubs are slung over her shoulder, and together they
foot it to the first tee. . . . He is just scratch, and she. . . . let's
think. . . ."
"Eight would be a good sort of handicap," murmured the girl.
"Eight it is," said Vane. "That means he gives her six strokes, and
generally beats her."
"I'll bet he doesn't," cried the girl.
"You must not interrupt the old gipsy, my lady," rebuked Vane, "You see,
it doesn't matter to those two which wins--not a little bit, for the most
important hole in the course is the tenth. It's a short hole, with the
most enormous sand bunker guarding the green on the right. And though
for nine holes neither of them has sliced, at the tenth they both do.
And if by chance one of them doesn't, that one loses the hole. You see
it's the most dreadful bunker, and somehow they've got to get to the
bottom of it. Well--it would be quite unfair if only one of them went
there--so the non-slicer loses the hole."
The girl's face was dimpling gloriously. . . .
"Then when they've got there--he just takes her in his arms and kisses
her; and she kisses him. Just now and then she'll whisper, 'My dear, my
dear--but it's good to be alive,' but most times they just kiss. Then
they go on and finish their game. Except for that interlude they are
really very serious golfers."
"And when they've finished their game--what then?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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