Things that are found before they're lost, Be always first to find. Restore dogs for a pound or two You'll do a thing that's kind, And you must sport a blue billy, Or a yellow wipe tied loosily [9] Round your scrag for bloaks to see [10] That you're a Leary Man IX At knock-'em-downs and tiddlywink, To be a sharp you must not shrink, But be a brick and sport your chink [11] To win must be your plan. And set-toos and Cock-fighting Are things you must take delight in, And always try to be right in And every kidment scan. X And bullying and chaffing too, To you should be well known, Your nob be used to bruisery, [12] And hard as any stone. Put the kiebosh on the dibbery, Know a Joey from a tibbery, And now and then have a black eye, To be a Leary Man. XI To fairs and races go must you, And get in rows and fights a few, And stopping out all night it's true Must often be your plan. And as through the world you budgery, Get well awake to fudgery, And rub off every grudgery, And do the best you can. XII But mummery and slummery You must keep in your mind, For every day, mind what I say, Fresh fakements you will find. But stick to this while you can crawl. To stand 'till you're obliged to fall, And when you're wide awake to all You'll be a Leary Man. [1: dodge; learn] [2: nonsense] [3: money] [4: drink] [5: hat; head] [6: necktie] [7: talk slang] [8: Notes] [9: handkerchief] [10: neck; men] [11: good fellow; money] [12: head; pugilism] "A HUNDRED STRETCHES HENCE" [Notes] [1859] [From _The Vocabulum: or Rogues Lexicon_, by G. W. MATSELL, New York]. I Oh! where will be the culls of the bing [1] A hundred stretches hence? [2] The bene morts who sweetly sing, [3] A hundred stretches hence? The autum-cacklers, autum-coves, [4] The jolly blade who wildly roves; [5] And where the buffer, bruiser, blowen, [6] And all the cops, and beaks so knowin, [7] A hundred stretches hence? II And where the swag so bleakly pinched [8] A hundred stretches hence? The thimbles, slangs, and danglers filched, [9] A hundred stretches hence? The chips, the fawneys, chatty-feeders, [10] The bugs, the boungs, and well-filled readers; [11] And where the fence, and snoozing ken, [12] With all the prigs and lushing men, [13] A hundred stretches hence? III Played out they lay, it will be said A hundred stretches hence; With shovels they were put to bed [14] A hundred stretches since! Some rubbed to wit had napped a winder, [15] And some were scragged and took a blinder, [16] Planted the swag and lost to sight, [17] We'll bid them one and all good-night, A hundred stretches hence.