Looking around to find just where the natural service of the House of
Commons comes in, I am inclined to think that it must be in the practice
of "asking questions" in the House. Whenever anything goes wrong a
member rises and asks a question. He gets up, for example, with a little
paper in his hand, and asks the government if ministers are aware that
the Khedive of Egypt was seen yesterday wearing a Turkish Tarbosh.
Ministers say very humbly that they hadn't known it, and a thrill runs
through the whole country. The members can apparently ask any questions
they like. In the repeated visits which I made to the gallery of the
House of Commons I was unable to find any particular sense or meaning
in the questions asked, though no doubt they had an intimate bearing
on English politics not clear to an outsider like myself. I heard one
member ask the government whether they were aware that herrings were
being imported from Hamburg to Harwich. The government said no. Another
member rose and asked the government whether they considered Shakespere
or Moliere the greater dramatic artist. The government answered that
ministers were taking this under their earnest consideration and that
a report would be submitted to Parliament. Another member asked the
government if they knew who won the Queen's Plate this season at
Toronto. They did,--in fact this member got in wrong, as this is the
very thing that the government do know. Towards the close of the evening
a member rose and asked the government if they knew what time it was.
The Speaker, however, ruled this question out of order on the ground
that it had been answered before.
The Parliament Buildings are so vast that it is not possible to state
with certainty what they do, or do not, contain. But it is generally
said that somewhere in the building is the House of Lords. When they
meet they are said to come together very quietly shortly before the
dinner hour, take a glass of dry sherry and a biscuit (they are all
abstemious men), reject whatever bills may be before them at the moment,
take another dry sherry and then adjourn for two years.
The public are no longer allowed unrestricted access to the Houses of
Parliament; its approaches are now strictly guarded by policemen. In
order to obtain admission it is necessary either to (A) communicate
in writing with the Speaker of the House, enclosing certificates of
naturalization and proof of identity, or (B) give the policeman five
shillings. Method B is the one usually adopted. On great nights,
however, when the House of Commons is sitting and is about to do
something important, such as ratifying a Home Rule Bill or cheering,
or welcoming a new lady member, it is not possible to enter by merely
bribing the policeman with five shillings; it takes a pound. The English
people complain bitterly of the rich Americans who have in this way
corrupted the London public. Before they were corrupted they would do
anything for sixpence.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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