My empress; twenty-three years of intimate life with the empress of all the Russias from her marriage to the day of her exileMouchanow, Marfa
History
My empress; twenty-three years of intimate life with the empress of all the Russias from her marriage to the day of her exile
Mouchanow, Marfa
Alexandra, Empress, consort of Nicholas II, Emperor of Russia, 1872-1918
My mistress has been reproached at different times for having shown
herself indifferent to the cause of national education, and for not
having considered that problem with the attention it deserved. But
this was also an unreasonable reproach. The Empress could not, even if
she had so wished, have interfered with the conduct of the different
educational establishments for women in the Empire. These were all of
them placed under the patronage of the Empress Dowager, who was far too
jealous of her privileges in that respect to have consented to share
them with her daughter-in-law. The same thing might have been said in
regard to the work of the Red Cross, which was entirely controlled by
Marie Feodorovna, who brought to it great knowledge and considerable
ability. But at the same time she would not allow the young Czarina
to interfere with it, and when the latter tried in her various visits
to the Front to suggest this or that improvement in the management of
the different hospitals she inspected, her mother-in-law instantly
protested and declared herself affronted by what she considered to be
a criticism on her management. The young Empress had to devote herself
to the care of the wounded in the different hospitals which she had
organised at Czarskoi Selo, and her work remained confined to the
great committee for relief of the refugees from the invaded countries
and other victims of the war, which the Emperor had founded at the
beginning of the campaign, and the care and patronage of which he had
placed under the management of his wife. It was an interesting but at
the same time a most disheartening work, because it was impossible to
follow its execution, and one had perforce to depend on people more or
less reliable. My mistress often regretted that she was debarred from
putting her experience and her great love for her neighbour at the
service of the army. This, however, was denied her, perhaps not without
reason, because by that time she had already become most unpopular
among the troops, who had taken to calling her “the German.” One day
when she was inspecting a field ambulance, she heard the expression
in reference to herself and was so overcome by it that she could not
restrain her tears. The poor woman, though she knew that she was
regarded with anything but affection by her husband’s subjects, yet had
believed that the army at least appreciated her care and her desire for
its welfare. The discovery that such was far from being the case was
a great blow to her. As time went on, carrying away with it all her
hopes of winning the love of the Russian nation, she became hardened
and ceased to conceal the contempt which she felt for a world that had
failed to realise and to believe in her good intentions. But through
it all she applied herself to hide from her children the intensity
of her disillusions, and she went on instilling into them those high
principles to which she had tried to remain faithful herself. Her
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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