My Lady Nicotine: A Study in SmokeBarrie, J. M. (James Matthew)
General
My Lady Nicotine: A Study in Smoke
Barrie, J. M. (James Matthew)
Smoking -- Anecdotes; Tobacco -- Anecdotes; Wit and humor, Pictorial
Seeing that I had him, Jimmy advanced to the hearth-rug as if about to
make his statement; then changed his mind and, thrusting a dozen of the
letters into my hands, invited me to read. The first letter ran:
"Dearest Uncle Jim,--I must tell you about my canary. I love my canary
very much. It is a yellow canary, and it sings so sweetly. I keep it in
a cage, and it is so tame. Mamma and me wishes you would come and see us
and our canary. Dear Uncle Jim, I love you.--Your little friend, Milly
(aged four years)." Here is the second: "Dear Uncle Jim,--You will want
to know about my blackbird. It sits in a tree and picks up the crumbs
on the window, and Thomas wants to shoot it for eating the cherries;
but I won't let Thomas shoot it, for it is a nice blackbird, and I have
wrote all this myself.--Your loving little Bobby (aged five years)."
In another, Jacky (aged four and a half) described his parrot, and I
have also vague recollections of Harry (aged six) on his chaffinch, and
Archie (five) on his linnet. "What does it mean?" I demanded of Jimmy,
who, while I read, had been smoking savagely. "Don't you see that they
are in for the prize?" he growled. Then he made his statement.
"I have never," Jimmy said, "contributed to the _Saturday_, nor,
indeed, to any well-known paper. That, however, was only because the
editors would not meet me half-way. After many disappointments,
fortune--whether good or bad I cannot say--introduced me to the
editor of _Mothers Pets_, a weekly journal whose title sufficiently
suggests its character. Though you may never have heard of it,
_Mothers Pets_ has a wide circulation and is a great property. I
was asked to join the staff under the name of 'Uncle Jim,' and did not
see my way to refuse. I inaugurated a new feature. Mothers' pets were
cordially invited to correspond with me on topics to be suggested week
by week, and prizes were to be given for the best letters. This feature
has been an enormous success, and I get the most affectionate letters
from mothers, consulting me about teething and the like, every week.
They say that I am dearer to their children than most real uncles, and
they often urge me to go and stay with them. There are lots of kisses
awaiting me. I also get similar invitations from the little beasts
themselves. Pass the Arcadia."
[Illustration]
[Illustration]
CHAPTER X.
SCRYMGEOUR.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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