My Lady Nicotine: A Study in SmokeBarrie, J. M. (James Matthew)
General
My Lady Nicotine: A Study in Smoke
Barrie, J. M. (James Matthew)
Smoking -- Anecdotes; Tobacco -- Anecdotes; Wit and humor, Pictorial
"Here," thought Scrymgeour that night over a pipe of the Mixture, "the
affair ends; though I dare say the young lady will call me terrible
names when she hears that I have personated her lover. I must take care
to avoid the father now, for he will feel that I have been following
him. Perhaps I should have made a clean breast of it; but I do loathe
explanations."
[Illustration]
Two days afterward Scrymgeour passed the father and daughter on the
river. The lady said "Thank you" to him with her eyes, and, still more
remarkable, the old gentleman bowed.
Scrymgeour thought it over. "She is grateful to me," he concluded, "for
drawing away suspicion from the other man, but what can have made the
father so amiable? Suppose she has not told him that I am an impostor,
he should still look upon me as a villain; and if she has told him, he
should be still more furious. It is curious, but no affair of mine."
Three times within the next few days he encountered the lady on the
tow-path or elsewhere with a young gentleman of empty countenance, who,
he saw must be the real Lothario. Once they passed him when he was in
the shadow of a tree, and the lady was making pretty faces with a
cigarette in her mouth. The house-boat _Heathen Chinee_ lay but a
short distance off, and Scrymgeour could see the owner gazing after his
daughter placidly, a pipe between his lips.
[Illustration]
"He must be approving of her conduct now," was my friend's natural
conclusion. Then one forenoon Scrymgeour travelled to town in the same
compartment as the old gentleman, who was exceedingly frank, and made
sly remarks about romantic young people who met by stealth when there
was no reason why they should not meet openly. "What does he mean?"
Scrymgeour asked himself, uneasily. He saw terribly elaborate
explanations gathering and shrank from them.
Then Scrymgeour was one day out in a punt, when he encountered the old
gentleman in a canoe. The old man said, purple with passion, that he
was on his way to pay Mr. Scrymgeour a business visit. "Oh, yes," he
continued, "I know who you are; if I had not discovered you were a man
of means I would not have let the thing go on, and now I insist on an
explanation."
Explanations!
They made for Scrymgeour's house-boat, with almost no words on the young
man's part; but the father blurted out several things--as that his
daughter knew where he was going when he left the _Heathen Chinee_,
and that he had an hour before seen Scrymgeour making love to another
girl.
"Don't deny it!" cried the indignant father; "I recognized you by your
velvet coat and broad hat."
Then Scrymgeour began to see more clearly. The girl had encouraged
the deception, and had been allowed to meet her lover because he was
supposed to be no adventurer but the wealthy Mr. Scrymgeour. She must
have told the fellow to get a coat and hat like his to help the plot.
At the time the artist only saw all this in a jumble.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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