earnestly coveted by aspiring preachers as are political offices in the
nation at large. Perhaps this is all right; certainly, if figures,
churches and converts count, the Methodists have done a great work; but
Methodism as a religious cult had to pass me by.
The good villagers tried numberless times to have me "converted," and
officially I have gone through this performance a number of times.
Strangely enough, after nearly every one of my earlier runaway trips and
my humble return to the village, bedraggled and torn, some revivalist
had preceded me, and was holding forth at a great rate in the "Old
First," where my people communed. My grandmother, my father's mother,
invariably insisted on my attending the revival services in the hope
that finally I would come to my senses and really "get religion." As
much as anything else to show that I was sorry for the anxiety I had
caused my mother during the latest escapade, I would take my
grandmother's advice and join the mourners at the mercy seat. Two or
three visits usually sufficed to effect a change in me, and I would hold
up my hand with those who desired conversion. I was not insincere in
this, far from it. It came from nervousness and a desire to go home and
be able to say honestly that I meant to mend my ways. I shall never
forget the last time I attempted to get Divine grace and healing at one
of these meetings. The preceding escapade had been woefully bad, and it
was very much up to me to atone for it in no unmistakable manner. The
relatives were all looking at me askance, and the neighbors were
cautioning their children more particularly than usual to keep out of my
company. Indeed, I became at a jump the village "bad boy," and I never
really got over this appellation. I have heard good Methodist mothers
say, as I passed by in the street: "There goes that awful Flynt boy,"
and I came to look upon myself as the local boy outcast. In later years
I have changed considerably in my attitude toward people who criticise
and revile me, but at the time in question I was a timid, bashful lad in
temperament, and the ruthless remarks made by the Methodist mothers--the
Methodist fathers also discussed my "case" pretty mouthily--made scars
in my soul that are there yet. The truth of the matter is, I was not so
innately bad as my persistent running away and occasional pilfering
seemed to imply. I was simply an ordinary boy possessed of an
extraordinary bump for wandering, which, when the "go-fever" was in me,
sent me off to strange parts and peculiar adventures before any one had
time to realize that I was in one of my tantrums. The attack would come
so suddenly that I was off and away before I had myself fully realized
that I had been seized with one of the periodical fits.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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