Then there is them wimmen that go to have a good time of it, they get kinder sick of stayin’ to home, and nothin’ happenin’. And so they take thier work, and flock in to visit the afflicted. I should think I had pretty near 25 a day of ’em, and each one started 25 different subjects. Wild, crazy subjects, most of ’em, such as fires, runaway matches, and whirlwinds; earthquakes, neighberhood fightin’, and butter that wouldn’t come; great tidal waves, railroad axidents, balky horses, and overskirts; man slaughter, politix, schism, and frizzled hair. I believe it would have drawed more sweat from a able bodied man to have laid still and heard it, than to mow a five acre lot in dog days. And there my head was takin’ on, and achin’ as if it would come off all the time. If I could have had one thing at a time, I could have stood it better. I shouldn’t have minded a earthquake so much, if I could have give my full attention to it, but I must have conflegrations at the same time on my mind, and hens that wouldn’t set, and drunken men, and crazy wimmin, and jumpin’ sheep, and female suffragin’ and calico cut biasin’, and the Rushen war, and politix. It did seem some of the time, that my head must split open, and I guess the doctor got scairt about me, for one mornin’ after he went away, Josiah came into the room, and I see that he looked awful sober and gloomy, but the minute he ketched my eye, he began to snicker and laugh. I didn’t say nothin’ at first, and shet my eyes, but when I opened ’em agin, there he was a standin’ lookin’ down on me with the same mournful, agonized expression onto his features; not a word did he speak, but when he see me a lookin’ at him, he bust out laughin’ agin, and then says I-- “What is the matter, Josiah Allen?” Says he, “I’m a bein’ cheerful, Samantha!” [Illustration: BEIN’ CHEERFUL.] Says I in the faint accents of weakness, “You are bein’ a natural born idiot, and do you stop it.” Says he, “I won’t stop it, Samantha, I _will_ be cheerful;” and he giggled. Says I, “Won’t you go out, and let me rest a little, Josiah Allen?” “No!” says he firmly, “I will stand by you, and I will be cheerful,” and he snickered the loudest he had yet, but at the same time his countenance was so awfully gloomy and anxious lookin’ that it filled me with a strange awe as he continued-- “The doctor told me that you must be kep’ perfectly quiet, and I must be cheerful before you, and while I have the spirit of a man I _will_ be cheerful,” and with a despairin’ countenance, he giggled and snickered. I knew what a case he was to do his duty, and I groaned out, “There haint no use a tryin’ to stop him.” “No,” says he, “there haint no use a arguin’ with me--I shall do my duty.” And he bust out into a awful laugh that almost choked him. I knew there wouldn’t be no rest for me, while he stood there performin’ like a circus, and so says I in a strategim way--