Neghborly Poems and Dialect SketchesRiley, James Whitcomb
General
Neghborly Poems and Dialect Sketches
Riley, James Whitcomb
Dialect literature, American; Dialect poetry, American
great long beard made out o' corn-silks, and you wouldn't a-knowed him
ef it wasn't fer his voice. Well, he was a-p'tendin' he was a squire
a-tryin' some kind o' law-suit, you see; and John Wesley he was the
defendunt, and Joney Wiles, I believe it was, played like he was the
plaintive. And they'd had a fallin' out 'bout some land, and was
a-lawin' fer p'session, you understand. Well, Bob he made out it was a
mighty bad case when _John-Wes_ comes to consult him 'bout it, and
tells _him_ ef a little p'int o' law was left out he thought he could
git the land fer him. And then John-Wes _bribes_ him, you understand,
to leave out the p'int o' law, and the squire says he'll do all he kin,
and so John-Wes goes out a-feelin' purty good. Then _Wiles_ comes in to
consult the squire, don't you see. And the 'squire tells _him_ the same
tale he told _John Wesley_. So _Wiles_ bribes him to leave out the
p'int o' law in _his_ favor, don't you know. So when the case is tried
he decides in favor o' John-Wes, a-tellin' _Wiles_ some cock-and-bull
story 'bout havin' to manage it thataway so's to git the case mixed
so's he could git it fer him shore; and posts _him_ to sue fer change
of venue or somepin',--anyway, Wiles gits a new trial, and then the
squire decides in _his_ favor, and tells John-Wes another trial will
fix it in _his_ favor, and so on.--And so it goes on tel, anyway, he
gits holt o' the land hisse'f and all their money besides, and leaves
them to hold the bag! Well-sir, it was purty well got up; and they said
it was John-Wes's doin's, and I 'low it was--he was a good hand at
anything o' that sort, and knowed how to make fun.--But I've be'n
a-tellin' you purty much ever'thing but what I started out with, and
I'll try and hurry through, 'cause I know you're tired.
'Long 'bout the beginnin' o' summer, things had got back to purty much
the old way. The boys round was a-gittin' devilish, and o' nights
'specially theyr was a sight o' meanness a-goin' on. The mill-hands,
most of 'em, was mixed up in it--Coke and Morris, and them 'at had
jined meetin' 'long in the winter had all backslid, and was a-drinkin'
and carousin' round worse'n ever.
People perdicted 'at _Bills_ would backslide, but he helt on faithful,
to all appearance; said he liked to see a feller when he made up his
mind to do right, he liked to see him do it, and not go back on his
word; and even went so fer as to tell Ezry ef they didn't putt a stop
to it he'd quit the neighberhood and go somers else. And Bills was
Ezry's head man then, and he couldn't a-got along 'thout him; and I
b'lieve ef Bills had a-said the word old Ezry would a-turned off ever'
hand he had.--He got so he jist left ever'thing to Bills. Ben Carter
was turned off fer somepin', and nobody ever knowed what. Bills and him
had never got along jist right sence the fight.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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