Reader, if thou should'st chance to be a married man, when thy rib--so vulgarly called in epitome, though perchance the better half of thyself--rails against thy only consolation in domestic broils,--smoking--answer not, we beseech thee. No, not a word of the volume of eloquence we fancy rising indignantly in thy throat, against the cruel calumnies levelled at thy favorite Virginia, as thou valuest the safety of thy tube, whether Dutch or Merschaum. The voice of an angel would not avail thee in thy cause. With reference to the _faculty_, though divided in opinions, we shall only notice those arrayed against the plant divine. Indeed, the enmity of a physician dependent upon his profession for support may be always known; he detests anything cheap and soothing, conducive to health, and thence his frequent antipathy to tobacco in smoking. In regard to snuff he is wisely meek; for what were he himself without the stimulating dust in his pocket? In former times, indeed, its influence perhaps was greater and more respected than the wig and cane together, as Swift says:-- "Sir Plume, of Amber snuff-box, justly vain, And the nice conduct of a clouded cane." Well, and what do the faculty say with reference to smoking? Some will tell you it is hurtful to the lungs; others, that the head and heart are more particularly affected by it; very few of them agreeing precisely as to ill effects to be attributed to it. Grant us patience to bear such ingratitude! While they are indebted for their consequence and fluency of discourse, to the wit-inspiring influence of the herb in grain, they are running it down in another and not less delightful preparation and form. Then, by way of conclusion, like a crier of last dying speeches, comes to be related the death of some very promising young man, who, through the frequent habit of smoking, which he practised against the continued advice of the grave Monitor--made his exit in a consumption. So if a man habituated to the pleasures of a pipe goes off in a consumption, the anti-smokers must immediately assert it was brought on by the use of tobacco. How do we know, indeed, but that its magic influence kept him alive much longer than he would have been, without it: supposing--and we suppose it only for the sake of argument, that one or two, nay, say twenty in the thousand, suffer in their health through smoking,--the abuse and not the use of which we candidly admit may slightly impair some peculiar constitutions,--where is the recreant who does not, feeling the joys of smoking, say with us, a "short life and a merry one!" What, after all, are a few years in the scale of human existence! Is the fear of losing one or two of their number, to deter us from availing ourselves of innocent pleasures within our reach?--if so, London, methinks, would soon be deserted by the scientific and intelligent portion of its inhabitants, merely because the Thames water chances to be