Great Britain -- History -- George V, 1910-1936 -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
"I'm _going_ to the front. I'm going to the real front. I was passed A1
this morning. I am going to study the blood reactions of the service
horse under fire."
"Well, you're a damn good chap," Tietjens said. There was nothing to be
done. The amazing activities of which Sylvia would be capable were just
the thing to send laughter raging like fire through a cachinnating army.
She could not, thank God, get into France: to that place. But she could
make scandals in the papers that every Tommie read. There was no game of
which she was not capable. That sort of pursuit was called "pulling the
strings of shower-baths" in her circle of friends. Nothing. Nothing to
be done. . . . The beastly hurricane lamp was smoking.
"I'll tell you what to do," he said to Lieutenant Hotchkiss.
Mackenzie had tossed his sheet of rhymes under his nose. Tietjens read:
_Death, moil, coil, breath_. . . _Saith_--"The dirty Cockney!" _Oil, soil,
wraith_. . . .
"I'd be blowed," Mackenzie said with a vicious grin, "if I was going to
give you rhymes you had suggested yourself . . ."
The officer said:
"I don't of course want to be a nuisance if you're busy."
"It's no nuisance," Tietjens said. "It's what we're for. But I'd suggest
that now and then you say 'sir' to the officer commanding your unit. It
sounds well before the men. . . . Now you go to No. XVI I.B.D.
Mess ante-room . . . The place where they've got the broken
bagatelle-table. . . ."
The voice of Sergeant-Major Cowley exclaimed tranquilly from outside:
"Fall in now. Men who've got their ring papers and identity disks--three
of them--on the left. Men who haven't, on the right. Any man who has not
been able to draw his blankets tell Colour-Sergeant Morgan. Don't
forget. You won't get any where you're going. Any man who hasn't made
his will in his Soldier's Small Book or elsewhere and wants to, to
consult Captain Tietjens. Any man who wants to draw money, ask Captain
Mackenzie. Any R.C. who wants to go to confession after he has got his
papers signed can find the R.C. padre in the fourth hut from the left in
the Main Line from here. . . . And damn kind it is of his reverence to
put himself out for a set of damn blinking mustard-faced red herrings
like you who can't keep from running away to the first baby's bonfire
you sees. You'll be running the other way before you're a week older,
though what good they as asks for you thinks you'll be out there God
knows. You _look_ like a squad of infants' companions from a Wesleyan
Sunday school. That's what you look like and, thank God, we've got a
Navy."
Under cover of his voice Tietjens had been writing:
"Now we affront the grinning chops of _Death_," and saying to Lieutenant
Hotchkiss: "In the I.B.D. anteroom you'll find any number of dirty
little squits of Glamorganshires drinking themselves blind over _La Vie
Parisienne_. . . . Ask any one of them you like. . . ." He wrote:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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