Mrs. Wainwright was too proud and jubilant to scold him for his
temerity, and stood smiling at her gate, calling to the neighbours to
"Jest see our Gaffer! Theer, he's gone an' oppened window all hissel',
an's lookin' out same's ony on us."
At last the procession moved on again, the band--at least that portion
of it which hailed from Thornleigh playing "He's a Jolly Good Fellow,"
while the Upton musicians tried to drown the efforts of their comrades
by striking up "See the Conquering Hero Comes."
The meaning of this last was presently made clear to Old Bob
Wainwright, whose triumph was of but short duration, for lo! beneath
his window, the second part of the procession suddenly halted, and
there in the middle of the Upton folk, stood his rival, Martin Tyrer!
Much enveloped, indeed, in wraps and comforters, rather pale as to
complexion, very hoarse as to voice, but nevertheless no other than
Martin Tyrer himself. Bob's face fell, and he stared vacantly forth
without attempting to move.
"Well," cried Tyrer huskily, but triumphantly, "thou'rt theer, art
thou, owd brid? I'm fain th' lads gave thee a cheer to keep thy
sperrits up--we'se drink thy health jest now. I've cotched thee at
last thou sees! This here's fifty-three times as I've walked.
Fifty-three times!" raising his voice to a bellow--"I'm th' owdest
member, now, as how 'tis. Good-day to thee, Robert, I hope thou'lt be
about wick an' hearty this time next year--thou'lt be _second_ owdest
member, an' we'se be fain to see thee among us."
With a cheer and a roar of laughter the party moved on, Martin,
turning after a few steps, to hold up all five fingers of one hand,
and three of the other, intending thereby, according to an
arithmetical system of his own, to denote the number of fifty-three.
Bob quite understood the exasperating allusion, and grew, if possible,
redder in the face than before, though, for the moment, his surprise,
anger, and humiliation left him absolutely dumb.
His family had a bad time of it during all the remainder of that day:
bandages were flying, pillows were pitched aside, food was spurned and
upset, and plates were broken. The choice language, however, which
usually accompanied these tokens of displeasure was not heard to-day.
Since the insult which had followed so close upon the heels of the old
man's triumph, he had continued vengefully mute.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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