O'Flaherty V.C.: A Recruiting PamphletShaw, Bernard
General
O'Flaherty V.C.: A Recruiting Pamphlet
Shaw, Bernard
Comedy plays; Ireland -- Drama; World War, 1914-1918 -- Ireland -- Drama; World War, 1914-1918 -- Veterans -- Drama
O'FLAHERTY. I never told her one word that wasn't the truth and nothing
but the truth. I told her I was going to fight for the French and for
the Russians; and sure who ever heard of the French or the Russians
doing anything to the English but fighting them? That was how it was,
sir. And sure the poor woman kissed me and went about the house singing
in her old cracky voice that the French was on the sea, and they'd be
here without delay, and the Orange will decay, says the Shan Van Vocht.
SIR PEARCE [sitting down again, exhausted by his feelings]. Well, I
never could have believed this. Never. What do you suppose will happen
when she finds out?
O'FLAHERTY. She mustn't find out. It's not that she'd half kill me, as
big as I am and as brave as I am. It's that I'm fond of her, and can't
bring myself to break the heart in her. You may think it queer that a
man should be fond of his mother, sir, and she having bet him from the
time he could feel to the time she was too slow to ketch him; but I'm
fond of her; and I'm not ashamed of it. Besides, didn't she win the
Cross for me?
SIR PEARCE. Your mother! How?
O'FLAHERTY. By bringing me up to be more afraid of running away than of
fighting. I was timid by nature; and when the other boys hurted me, I'd
want to run away and cry. But she whaled me for disgracing the blood of
the O'Flahertys until I'd have fought the divil himself sooner than face
her after funking a fight. That was how I got to know that fighting was
easier than it looked, and that the others was as much afeard of me as
I was of them, and that if I only held out long enough they'd lose heart
and give rip. That's the way I came to be so courageous. I tell you, Sir
Pearce, if the German army had been brought up by my mother, the Kaiser
would be dining in the banqueting hall at Buckingham Palace this day,
and King George polishing his jack boots for him in the scullery.
SIR PEARCE. But I don't like this, O'Flaherty. You can't go on deceiving
your mother, you know. It's not right.
O'FLAHERTY. Can't go on deceiving her, can't I? It's little you know
what a son's love can do, sir. Did you ever notice what a ready liar I
am?
SIR PEARCE. Well, in recruiting a man gets carried away. I stretch it
a bit occasionally myself. After all, it's for king and country. But if
you won't mind my saying it, O'Flaherty, I think that story about
your fighting the Kaiser and the twelve giants of the Prussian guard
singlehanded would be the better for a little toning down. I don't ask
you to drop it, you know; for it's popular, undoubtedly; but still, the
truth is the truth. Don't you think it would fetch in almost as many
recruits if you reduced the number of guardsmen to six?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account