Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of LancasterCannan, Gilbert
General
Old Mole: Being the Surprising Adventures in England of Herbert Jocelyn Beenham, M.A., Sometime Sixth-Form Master at Thrigsby Grammar School in the County of Lancaster
Cannan, Gilbert
England -- Fiction; Husband and wife -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction
At their next stopping-place, on the outskirts of the Pottery towns,
disaster awaited the company. A wheel of the caravan jammed as they
were going down a hill and delayed them for some hours, so that they
arrived too late in the evening to give a performance. Mr. Copas
insisted that the theater should be erected, and lashed his assistants
with bitter and blasphemous words, so that they became excited and
flurried and made a sad muddle of their work. When at last it was
finished and Mr. Copas went out himself to post up his bills on the
walls of the neighborhood, where of all places he regarded his fame as
most secure, he had got no farther than the corner of the square when
he came on a gleaming white building that looked as though it were
made of icing sugar, glittering and dazzling with electric light and
plastered all over with lurid pictures of detectives and criminals and
passionate men and women in the throes of amorous catastrophes and
dilemmas. He stopped outside this place and stared it up and down,
gave it his most devastating fore-and-aft look, and uttered one word:
"Blast!"
Then unsteadily he made for the door of the public-house adjoining it
and called for the landlord, whom he had known twenty years and more.
From the platform of the theater Mrs. Copas saw him go in, and she
rushed to find Mr. Mole, and implored him to deliver her husband from
the seven devils who would assuredly possess him unless he were
speedily rescued and sent a-billposting.
Mr. Mole obeyed, and found the actor storming at the publican, asking
him how he dare take the bread from the belly and the air from the
nostrils of a nartist with a lot o' dancing dotty pictures. With
difficulty Mr. Copas was soothed and placated. He had ordered a glass
of beer in order to give himself a status in the house, and the
publican would not let him pay for it. Whereupon he spilled it on the
sanded floor and stalked out. Mr. Mole followed him and found him
brooding over a poster outside the "kinema" which represented a lady
in the act of saving her child from a burning hotel. He seized his
paste-pot, took out a bill from his satchel, and covered the heads of
the lady and her child with the announcement of his own arrival with
new plays and a brilliant and distinguished company.
When he was safely round the corner he seized his companion by the arm
and said excitedly:
"Ruining the country they are with them things. Last time I pitched
opposite one o' them, when they ought to have been working my own
company was in there watching the pictures."
"I have always understood," replied Mr. Mole, "that they have a
considerable educational value, and certainly it seems to me that
through them the people can come by a more accurate knowledge of the
countries and customs of the world than by reading or verbal
instruction."
Mr. Copas snorted:
"Have you _seen_ 'em?"
"No."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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