“Nothing of the sort,” he cried, pushing her away by the shoulder he had
grasped; “nothing the matter with me--that is, nothing out of the
ordinary. Come here, you nurse. I want to lie on the other side. Nothing
like a woman that knows what she is about and has her living to make by
it. Dear they are--cost a lot of money--but I never begrudged money for
comfort.”
“Papa,” said Katherine. What could she say? What words were possible to
break this spell, this unconsciousness and ignorance? It seemed to her
that he was about to fall over some dreadful precipice without knowing
it, without fearing it; was it better that he should know it, that he
should fear, when he was incapable of anything else? Should the acute
pang of mortal alarm before be added to--whatever there might be
afterwards? Wild words whirled through her head--about the great
judgment seat, about the reckoning with men for what they had done, and
the cry of the Prophet, “Prepare to meet thy God.” But how could this
restless old man prepare for anything, turning and returning upon his
bed. “Papa,” she repeated, “have you anything to say to me--nothing
about--about Stella?”
He turned his face to her for a moment with the old familiar chuckle in
his throat. “About Stella--oh, you will hear plenty about Stella--in
time,” he said.
“Not only about Stella, papa! Oh, about other things, about--about--”
she cried in a kind of despair, “about God.”
“Oh,” he said, “you think I’m going to die.” The chuckle came again, an
awful sound. “I’m not; you were always a little fool. Tell her, doctor,
I’m going to sleep--tuck in the clothes, nurse, and put--out--the
light.”
The last words fell from him drowsily, and calm succeeded to the endless
motion. There was another little murmur as of a laugh. Then the nurse
nodded her head from the other side of the bed, to show that he was
really going to sleep. Dr. Burnet put his hand on Katherine’s arm and
drew her into the dressing-room, leaving the door open between. “It may
last only a few minutes,” he said, “or it may last for ever; but we can
do nothing, neither you nor I. Sit down and wait here.”
It did last for ever. The sleep at first was interrupted with little
wakings, and that chuckle which had been the accompaniment of his life
broke in two or three times, ghastly, with a sort of sound of triumph.
And then all sound died away.
Katherine was awakened--she did not know if it was from a doze or a
dream--by a touch upon her arm. The doctor stood there in his large and
heavy vitality like an embodiment of life, and a faint blueness of dawn
was coming in at the window. “There was no pain,” he said, “no sort of
suffering or struggle. Half-past four exactly,” he had his watch in his
hand. “And now, Miss Tredgold, take this and go to bed.”
“Do you mean?” Katherine cried, rising hastily, then falling back again
in extreme agitation, trembling from head to foot.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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