“No, I am not ill; I haf no wants now, and no one has hurt me but in
kindness; yet I haf so great a grief, I could not bear it all alone,
and so I came to ask a little sympathy from your good Mutter, who
has been kind to me as if I was a son. She is not here, and I
thought I would stop back my grief; but that moosic was too much;
you pity me, and so I tell you. See, now! when I find things go
bright with me, and haf a hope of much work, I take the little store
I saved, I send it to my friend Carl Hoffman, who is coming from my
home, and say, 'Bring Ulla to me now, for I can make life go well to
her, and I am hungry till I haf her in my arms again.' I tell no
one, for I am bold to think that one day I come here with her in my
hand, to let her thank you in her so sweet way for all you haf done
for me. Well, I watch the wind, I count the days, I haf no rest for
joy; and when Carl comes, I fly to him. He gifs me back my store, he
falls upon my neck and does not speak, then I know my little Kind
will never come, for she has gone to Himmel before I could make a
home for her on earth. Oh, my Ulla! it is hard to bear;” and, with a
rain of bitter tears, poor Mr. Bopp covered up his face and laid it
down on his empty plate, as if he never cared to lift it up again.
Then Dolly forgot herself in her great sympathy, and, going to him,
she touched the bent head with a soothing hand; let her tears flow
to comfort his; and whispered in her tenderest voice,--
“Dear Mr. Bopp, I wish I could heal this sorrow, but as I cannot,
let me bear it with you; let me tell you how we loved the little
child, and longed to see her; how we should have rejoiced to know
you had so dear a friend to make your life happy in this strange
land; how we shall grieve for your great loss, and long to prove our
respect and love for you. I cannot say this as I ought, but, oh, be
comforted, for you will see the child again, and, remembering that
she waits for you, you will be glad to go when God calls you to meet
your Ulla in that other Fatherland.”
“Ah, I will go now! I haf no wish to stay, for all my life is black
to me. If I had found that other little friend to fill her place, I
should not grieve so much, because she is weller there above than I
could make her here; but no; I wait for that other one; I save all
my heart for her; I send it, but it comes back to me; then I know my
hope is dead, and I am all alone in the strange land.”
There was neither bitterness nor reproach in these broken words,
only a patient sorrow, a regretful pain, as if he saw the two lost
loves before him and uttered over them an irrepressible lament. It
was too much for Dolly and with sudden resolution she spoke out fast
and low,--
“Mr. Bopp, that was a mistake. It was not I you saw at the masque;
it was Dick. He played a cruel trick; he insulted you and wronged me
by that deceit, and I find it very hard to pardon him.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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