English fiction -- 20th century; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
He went out of the cave and looked round. The sea was still some way
out, but it came up quickly on this coast. In an hour ... in an hour....
He scanned the cliffs, and saw the ledge whither he would drag her. She
would cling to him crying, calling him her rescuer....
What should he do then? Should he leave her and swim for help? Or should
he scale the mighty cliff?
He returned to the cave and, gazing romantically at the sleeping Miss
Spratt, conjured up the scene. It would go like this, he thought.
_Miss Spratt_ (_wakened by the spray dashing over her face_). Oh, Mr.
Bales! We're cut off by the tide! Save me!
_W. Bales_ (_lightly_). Tut-tut, there's no danger. It's nothing.
(_Aside_) Great Heavens! Death stares us in the face!
_Miss Spratt_ (_throwing her arms around his neck_). William, save me; I
cannot swim!
_W. Bales_ (_with Waller face_). Trust me, Angelina. I will fight my way
round yon point and obtain help. (_Aside_) An Englishman can only die
once.
_Miss Spratt._ Don't leave me!
_W. Bales._ Fear not, sweetheart. See, there is a ledge where you will
be beyond the reach of the hungry tide. I will carry you thither in my
arms and will then----
At this point in his day-dream William took another look at the sleeping
Miss Spratt, felt his biceps doubtfully, and went on----
_W. Bales._ I will help you to climb thither, and will then swim for
help.
_Miss Spratt._ My hero!
Again and again William reviewed the scene to himself. It was perfect.
His photograph would be in the papers; Miss Spratt would worship him; he
would be a hero in his City office. The actual danger was slight, for at
the worst she could shelter in the far end of the cave; but he would not
let her know this. He would do the thing heroically--drag her to the
ledge on the cliff, and then swim round the point to obtain help.
The thought struck him that he could conduct the scene better in his
shirt-sleeves. He removed his coat, and then went out of the cave to
reconnoitre the ledge.
. . . . .
Miss Spratt awoke with a start and looked at her watch. It was 4.15. The
cave was empty save for a crumpled page of newspaper. She glanced at
this idly and saw that it was the local _Herald_ ... eight days old.
Far away on the horizon William Bales was throwing stones bitterly at
the still retreating sea.
OLD FRIENDS
"It was very nice of you to invite me to give you lunch," I said, "and
if only the waiter would bring the toast I should be perfectly happy. I
can't say more."
"Why not?" said Miss Middleton, looking up. "Oh, I see."
"And now," I said, when I had finished my business with a sardine, "tell
me all about it. I know something serious must have brought you up to
London. What is it? Have you run away from home?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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