Only an Ensign: A Tale of the Retreat from Cabul, Volume 2 (of 3)Grant, James
General
Only an Ensign: A Tale of the Retreat from Cabul, Volume 2 (of 3)
Grant, James
Afghan Wars -- Fiction
"I know her style perfectly," resumed Polwhele, oddly enough
proceeding to crush the unuttered thought; "so does Burgoyne; so do
Grahame and Ravelstoke, of the 37th, and ever so many more. She
asked you tenderly about animal magnetism--showed you the whiteness
of her ungloved hand, and asked you, no doubt, about the trimming of
her dress; but you were to be friends--the dearest friends only, and
all that sort of thing."
Poor Denzil was petrified; but these words were partly effecting a
cure, and he strove to laugh.
"Don't quiz me, Jack," said he; "but, upon my soul, I could be guilty
of any folly for that girl--yet it would be madness, you know. What
would the General say, and the mess think and say, too?"
"I don't precisely catch your meaning,--folly and madness are pretty
synonymous in a matrimonial sense; but what did you think of
committing yourself to? a proposal--eh?"
Denzil did not reply; he could only sigh and smoke viciously.
"Take your wine, old fellow, and don't bother about it," said Waller,
who had just begun to listen. "I nearly went mad for love myself in
my first red coat; but the Colonel saved me by detachment duty; and
when last I saw my inamorata, after seven years of matrimony, her
figure quite spoiled for waltzing, and a squad of little squalling
infantry about her, I laughed at my escape."
Denzil remembered the bantering remarks of the cavalry officer at the
band-stand; and their estimate of Rose seemed to tally unpleasantly
with that of Polwhele.
"Fool that I have been!--yet could I help it?" he thought. "Could I
help doing so again--though she is one that makes of love a jest and
a scoff?"
He felt that she had lured him into a passionate declaration merely
to cast him off wantonly and laugh at him, perhaps, with Audley
Trevelyan. She might not care for him, and yet dislike to see him,
care for _another_. Hence rage prompted him one moment to try and
fall in love with some other girl (there was not much choice in the
cantonment, certainly), and the next he felt cynically disposed to
hate her and all womankind. Anon that emotion would pass away, and
he felt himself still her very slave, who would plead for a word, a
glance, or smile.
To abstain from visiting as before would soon excite remark; and yet
to resume his visits would be to see, with bitterness and
humiliation, another too palpably preferred, where he had deemed
himself the chosen favourite.
"And is it actually true that Waller is booked at last?" said
Polwhele.
"Deuce! how can I tell?" replied Denzil, curtly, blowing away a ring
of smoke.
"It may be all gossip--for he is one whom hitherto the female world
have found impossible to entrap; but here comes Trevelyan," he added,
as the Hindoo servant placed lighted wax candles on the table, and
Audley entered, looking, as Denzil thought, provokingly handsome,
cool, self-possessed, and fashionable in bearing.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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