Opus 21: Descriptive Music for the Lower Kinsey Epoch of the Atomic Age, a Concerto for a One-man Band, Six Arias for Soap Operas, Fugues, Anthems & BarrelhouseWylie, Philip
Philosophy
Opus 21: Descriptive Music for the Lower Kinsey Epoch of the Atomic Age, a Concerto for a One-man Band, Six Arias for Soap Operas, Fugues, Anthems & Barrelhouse
Wylie, Philip
Authors -- Fiction; New York (N.Y.) -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; Patients -- Fiction; Philosophy -- Fiction
She throws the snowball. That's good. So okay--her mitten sticks to
it and soaks him square in the puss and instead of spitting out the
mitten--which he gets in his teeth--he makes like it's a mustache!
Hell! He's a football player, isn't he--not just an ice-man? Going to
be a big-shot brain specialist someday, isn't he? Quick thinker. So
okay. So he leaps and spears the mitten and the snowball like it's a
long forward and he runs at her and tackles her and spills her--not
real hard--but hard--and there's how they meet, the both of them lying
down in the snow with her on her back and the guy on top. Is that
good--or is it terrific?
And there, so help me Christ, after eleven days, and twenty-three
thousand dollars, is how they do meet.
Wrong coast for Aglaia, I say? I'm sure I did.
That morning's taste.
The rest of them. The contract. The months.
The arms and the lights and the bells became lost in the prospect and I
stepped from the curb and brakes trilled.
"Want a lift? You need one, pal."
That was Dave.
At my apartment, I made some coffee and later we went back together to
the address in Beverly Hills--because he didn't know it, and he was a
lonely guy, too.
In fact he still is.
The most brokenhearted guy in the world.
You see
nobody told him about the six-pointed star on the box he was shipped
in--he had to find out for himself.
And he wants to be sure, when he checks out, that he kept it bright
while he had the use of it.
Dave came in.
"By God," he said, "Wylie! The old, articulate cryptogram in person,
nude as a saint's stool!" It might have been a bracing autumn forenoon:
"I'm glad to see you! I was saying to a friend only the other night--a
jerk named Staunton--Staunton, the town's not the same--Wylie's not
here. The old termite has moved to the country--turned himself out to
pasture! And Florida in the winter! The son-of-a-bitch is chasing the
analema! Where's the patient?"
I pointed.
Dave took a look and came back.
"Shall we wake him up? I can take him to the office and get some of
my minions looking for his wench. Private dicks, too. They won't find
her. They couldn't find a luminous memorandum in a two-drawer filing
cabinet. But it might wear him down a little."
"Let him sleep, for now."
Dave sat down. "This is swell! Send for a barrel of iced tea, will
you--with a clear gin on the side? I had a hard night last night.
A bunch of the super-big-shots came in on the Super-Chief and the
Super-Century last night. Things in Hollywood are so bad that two of
them stayed sober the whole damned evening."
I phoned Room Service. "There's a depraved guest of mine up here who
wants some neat gin and a lot of iced tea--"
Dave had picked up one of my ashtrays and was looking at it intently.
When I hung up he said, "Depraved? Depraved, you say? Me? Don't I
detect not just one, but two colors of lipstick here?"
"Callers from the other rooms," I answered. "Came in to consult the
oracle."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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