Original Short Stories — Volume 10Maupassant, Guy de
General
Original Short Stories — Volume 10
Maupassant, Guy de
Short stories, French -- Translations into English
The soldier, understanding only that they wanted to make him eat all his
soup, laughed in a contented manner, making a sign to show that he could
not hold any more.
Then Saint Anthony, become quite familiar, tapped him on the stomach,
saying: “My, there is plenty in my pig's belly!” But suddenly he began to
writhe with laughter, unable to speak. An idea had struck him which made
him choke with mirth. “That's it, that's it, Saint Anthony and his pig.
There's my pig!” And the three servants burst out laughing in their turn.
The old fellow was so pleased that he had the brandy brought in, good
stuff, 'fil en dix', and treated every one. They clinked glasses with the
Prussian, who clacked his tongue by way of flattery to show that he
enjoyed it. And Saint Anthony exclaimed in his face: “Eh, is not that
superfine? You don't get anything like that in your home, pig!”
From that time Father Anthony never went out without his Prussian. He had
got what he wanted. This was his vengeance, the vengeance of an old
rogue. And the whole countryside, which was in terror, laughed to split
its sides at Saint Anthony's joke. Truly, there was no one like him when
it came to humor. No one but he would have thought of a thing like that.
He was a born joker!
He went to see his neighbors every day, arm in arm with his German, whom
he introduced in a jovial manner, tapping him on the shoulder: “See, here
is my pig; look and see if he is not growing fat, the animal!”
And the peasants would beam with smiles. “He is so comical, that reckless
fellow, Antoine!”
“I will sell him to you, Cesaire, for three pistoles” (thirty francs).
“I will take him, Antoine, and I invite you to eat some black pudding.”
“What I want is his feet.”
“Feel his belly; you will see that it is all fat.”
And they all winked at each other, but dared not laugh too loud, for fear
the Prussian might finally suspect they were laughing at him. Anthony,
alone growing bolder every day, pinched his thighs, exclaiming, “Nothing
but fat”; tapped him on the back, shouting, “That is all bacon”; lifted
him up in his arms as an old Colossus that could have lifted an anvil,
declaring, “He weighs six hundred and no waste.”
He had got into the habit of making people offer his “pig” something to
eat wherever they went together. This was the chief pleasure, the great
diversion every day. “Give him whatever you please, he will swallow
everything.” And they offered the man bread and butter, potatoes, cold
meat, chitterlings, which caused the remark, “Some of your own, and
choice ones.”
The soldier, stupid and gentle, ate from politeness, charmed at these
attentions, making himself ill rather than refuse, and he was actually
growing fat and his uniform becoming tight for him. This delighted Saint
Anthony, who said: “You know, my pig, that we shall have to have another
cage made for you.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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