At four o’clock in the morning, the subject of these resolutions was awakened from his innocent slumbers and hurried into a Knickerbocker ice wagon by detectives, with black masks over their faces. He struggled bravely, but--_pro bono publico--principiis obsta_. [Illustration] CHAPTER V. “THE CRACKLING.” ... PREPARATIONS FOR THE BLAZE. [Illustration] The morning smiled bright, and the mist rose on high, and the lark whistled “Hail Columbia” in the clear sky, on the tenth day of May, 1876, the day set apart for, and consecrated to, the opening of the Centennial Exposition. Old Probabilities himself was in the city, with his weather eye open. Early in the morning he fixed the barometer in front of McAllister’s at “set fair,” arranged the thermometer at 65°, and engaged a refreshing southern breeze to be around lively during the entire day. After this he ate his breakfast, enjoying a quiet conscience and a correspondingly good appetite. Shortly before daylight a very curious incident occurred--fortunately it ended happily. [OH SHAH, WHAT A FUSS!] The Shah of Persia, his son John, and the Sultan of Turkey, arrived together at Broad and Prime Street Depot. The city being weary of receiving dignitaries, no official and but little private notice was taken of their arrival. They jumped into a Union Line car. Unthinkingly, the Sultan put a dollar bill into the “Slawson box,” and then demanded his change from the conductor. Of course, the conductor was unable to open the box, and refused to give it to him, telling him he deserved to lose it for his stupidity. The Sultan became furious. “My change,” he cried; “I want my change, and I’m going to have it; seven cents for me, seven cents for the Shah, and four cents for little Shah, that’s eighteen cents; give me eighty-two cents change. You can’t cheat me, you swindling Americans!” Again the conductor refused and remonstrated; the Sultan was perfectly wild with rage; he drew his scimetar, and caught that conductor by the throat, and there would certainly have been an immediate vacancy for a conductor on the Union Line, had not Mr. McMichael been just then returning from a late banquet. Mr. McMichael, being a sportsman, was thoroughly conversant with wild turkey gobble; he smoothed matters over. He refunded the eighty-two cents from his own pocket, took the Eastern monarchs home with him, and afterwards secured them a bed in the coal cellar of the House of Correction, apologizing to them because they were obliged to share it with Mr. Carlyle, the English essayist. [Illustration]