Our Show: A Humorous Account of the International Exposition in Honor of the Centennial Anniversary of American Independence, from Inception to Completion, Including Description of Buildings, Biographies of Managers, Receptions of Foreign Dignitaries, Opening Ceremonies, Poem, Oration, Amusing Survey of All Departments, Incidents, Etc., Etc.Cohen, David Solis
History
Our Show: A Humorous Account of the International Exposition in Honor of the Centennial Anniversary of American Independence, from Inception to Completion, Including Description of Buildings, Biographies of Managers, Receptions of Foreign Dignitaries, Opening Ceremonies, Poem, Oration, Amusing Survey of All Departments, Incidents, Etc., Etc.
And the chief called his counsellors together, and Bardsley the son of
his father rose up and spoke. “Listen, ye pilgrims, to the words of
wisdom which fall like wild honey and locusts of the wilderness from
my lips!”
“Behold, the days of the Exposition are not yet quite done; it is
still unsafe to risk this man’s attendance thereat; but lo, I would
suggest a plan whereby we may display in safety our compassion.
“Let him ascend to the top of Sawyer’s Observatory, and from thence
look down upon the grounds, even as Moses of old looked down from
Nebo’s Height upon the Holy Land.”
Yes, reader, it seems almost beyond belief that the lion-hearted
solicitor should have been forgotten. That the city managed to worry
along for six months without his supervision, is one of those mysterious
chances which may only be explained when the light of history and
careful, unprejudiced investigation shall, in the far distant future,
illuminate the cobwebbed darkness of ages long then past.
As Bardsley suggested, so was it done. A committee was appointed with
power to act, and at high noon one clear, bright day, while special
thanksgiving services were being chanted in all the churches, the
General’s congealed form was hauled out of a wagon, with golden ice
nippers, and landed safely on the flag pavement of Independence Hall. A
gentle fire of rosewood shavings and sweet cacia wood was built around
him, and he was gradually and tenderly thawed out. The coat of ice
melted away; the stern features relaxed, the water dripped from all
portions of the herculean frame, the fog, mist, and steam generated by
the process cleared away, and
CHARLIE WAS HIMSELF AGAIN.
[THE CÆSAR OF THE AGE.]
While he was still receiving the congratulations of his friends, the
contractors who were required to remove the buildings approached, and
publicly offered him one hundred thousand dollars to remain in his own
dwelling until the close of the exhibition and then go out to the
grounds and cause a final crash. This, of course, would save them
immense time, labor, and expenditure. With the dignity of Cæsar on the
Lupercal, he drew his form to its full height, and casting one look of
disdain upon the contractors, who instantaneously disappeared beneath
the flagging to rise no more, he walked slowly up Chestnut Street,
followed by the plaudits of an enthusiastic mob.
THE AWARDS OF THE JUDGES,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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