|IF the "towers of Julius" are, as Gray called them, "London's lasting shame," the River is the lasting pride of Oxford. When does "The River" cease to be Isis and become Thames? One might as well ask when it ceases to be Thames and becomes Isis. The term is probably not used out of Oxford, and with much vagueness there. Matthew Arnold speaks of "the stripling Thames at Bablock-Hythe" (a very lovely ferry higher up than Oxford), and at Abingdon nobody talks about the Isis. The use of the name is one of the odd and pleasant conservatisms of Oxford. Then, again, there are two rivers in Oxford, according to the map, Thames and Cherwell; but to the undergraduate there are three--"The River," "The Upper River," and "The Cher." For the sake of strangers it may be well to elucidate this enigma. "The River" is that part of the Thames which begins at Folly Bridge and ends at Sandford, except that on the occasion of "long courses" and Commemoration picnics it is prolonged as far as Nuneham. It is understood subsequently to pass through several counties and reach eventually the German Ocean. You do not go upon "The River" commonly for amusement, but for stern and serious work. You aspire to a thwart in your College "torpid" first, then in your College "eight," with the fantastic possibility of a place in the "Trials" or--crown of all--in the 'Varsity "Eight" on some distant and auspicious day! It is no child's-play that is involved, as every oarsman knows. "The River" is an admirable school of self-control and self-denial, and "training"--long may it flourish!--is one of the best of disciplines. It has been said, and with truth, that boating-men are the salt of undergraduate society. [Illustration: 0084] [Illustration: 0085] The "Torpids" are rowed in March--you will appreciate this fact if you are rowing "bow" and a hailstorm comes on--in eight-oared boats with fixed seats. The name bestowed on them seems a little unkind. The "Eights" come off in the summer term, when sliding seats are used--to the greater comfort of the oarsmen, and the greater gratification of the lookers-on, for this rowing is out of all comparison prettier, and of course the boats travel at a greater pace. Both "Eights" and "Torpids," as most people are aware, are bumping races; that is, the boats start each at a given distance from the one behind it, and the object is to bump the boat in front, and so bump one s way to that proudest of all positions, "the Head of the River." A bump in front of the Barges (which Mr. Matthison has sketched), following a long and stern chase from Iffley, is a thing to live for. West of Folly Bridge "The River" might as well, for all the ordinary undergraduate knows of it, sink for some distance, like a certain classic stream, beneath the ground. Venturesome explorers tell of a tract of water put to base mechanical uses, flanked by dingy wharves and overlooked by attic windows.