Ozma of Oz: A Record of Her Adventures with Dorothy Gale of Kansas, the Yellow Hen, the Scarecrow, the Tin Woodman, Tiktok, the Cowardly Lion, and the Hungry Tiger; Besides Other Good People too Numerous to Mention Faithfully Recorded HereinBaum, L. Frank (Lyman Frank)
Science
Ozma of Oz: A Record of Her Adventures with Dorothy Gale of Kansas, the Yellow Hen, the Scarecrow, the Tin Woodman, Tiktok, the Cowardly Lion, and the Hungry Tiger; Besides Other Good People too Numerous to Mention Faithfully Recorded Herein
"I wish you could, indeed, free my aunt and her ten royal children,"
said she, eagerly. "For if they were restored to their proper forms
and station they could rule the Kingdom of Ev themselves, and that
would save me a lot of worry and trouble. At present there are at
least ten minutes every day that I must devote to affairs of state, and
I would like to be able to spend my whole time in admiring my beautiful
heads."
"Then we will presently discuss this matter," said Ozma, "and try to
find a way to liberate your aunt and cousins. But first you must
liberate another prisoner--the little girl you have locked up in your
tower."
"Of course," said Langwidere, readily. "I had forgotten all about her.
That was yesterday, you know, and a Princess cannot be expected to
remember today what she did yesterday. Come with me, and I will
release the prisoner at once."
So Ozma followed her, and they passed up the stairs that led to the
room in the tower.
While they were gone Ozma's followers remained in the drawing-room, and
the Scarecrow was leaning against a form that he had mistaken for a
copper statue when a harsh, metallic voice said suddenly in his ear:
"Get off my foot, please. You are scratch-ing my pol-ish."
"Oh, excuse me!" he replied, hastily drawing back. "Are you alive?"
"No," said Tiktok, "I am on-ly a ma-chine. But I can think and speak
and act, when I am pro-per-ly wound up. Just now my ac-tion is run
down, and Dor-o-thy has the key to it."
"That's all right," replied the Scarecrow. "Dorothy will soon be free,
and then she'll attend to your works. But it must be a great
misfortune not to be alive. I'm sorry for you."
"Why?" asked Tiktok.
"Because you have no brains, as I have," said the Scarecrow.
"Oh, yes, I have," returned Tiktok. "I am fit-ted with Smith &
Tin-ker's Im-proved Com-bi-na-tion Steel Brains. They are what make me
think. What sort of brains are you fit-ted with?"
"I don't know," admitted the Scarecrow. "They were given to me by the
great Wizard of Oz, and I didn't get a chance to examine them before he
put them in. But they work splendidly and my conscience is very
active. Have you a conscience?"
"No," said Tiktok.
"And no heart, I suppose?" added the Tin Woodman, who had been
listening with interest to this conversation.
"No," said Tiktok.
"Then," continued the Tin Woodman, "I regret to say that you are
greatly inferior to my friend the Scarecrow, and to myself. For we are
both alive, and he has brains which do not need to be wound up, while I
have an excellent heart that is continually beating in my bosom."
"I con-grat-u-late you," replied Tiktok. "I can-not help be-ing your
in-fer-i-or for I am a mere ma-chine. When I am wound up I do my du-ty
by go-ing just as my ma-chin-er-y is made to go. You have no i-de-a
how full of ma-chin-er-y I am."
"I can guess," said the Scarecrow, looking at the machine man
curiously. "Some day I'd like to take you apart and see just how you
are made."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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