Parodies of the works of English & American authors, vol. I
General
Parodies of the works of English & American authors, vol. I
Parodies
"And if indeed I cast the brand away,
Surely a precious thing, one worthy note,
Should thus be lost for ever from the earth,
Which might have pleased the eyes of many men.
What good should follow this, if this were done?
What harm, undone? Deep harm to disobey,
Seeing obedience is the bond of rule.
Were it well to obey then, if a king demand
An act unprofitable against himself?
The King is sick, and knows not what he does.
What record, or what relic of my lord
Should be to aftertime, but empty breath
And rumours of a doubt? but were this kept,
Stored in some treasure-house of mighty kings,
Some one might show it at a joust of arms,
Saying, 'King Arthur's sword, Excalibur.'"
Thus much of the original must indeed be in one's thoughts ere the _Voyage
de Guillaume_ can be appreciated; it recounts the holiday trip of the
Prime Minister to the north in September, 1883. It will be remembered that
Mr. Gladstone was the guest of Sir Donald Currie, on board the _Pembroke
Castle_, and that Alfred Tennyson was also one of the party.
VOYAGE DE GUILLAUME.--A FRAGMENT.
To the Editor of the _St. James's Gazette_.
SIR,--I have received the following lines from North Britain. Evidently
it was not without reason that the Prime Minister was accompanied on his
cruise by the Poet Laureate.--I am, Sir, your obedient servant,
H. H.
* * * * *
--So all the year the noise of talk had roared
Before the Speaker's chair at Westminster,
Until King Guillaume's council, man by man
Were tired to death, as also was their Chief,
King Guillaume. Then, observing he was bored,
The bold Sir Donald C. invited him
(Sir Donald C., the last of all his knights)
And bore him off to Barrow by the sea--
Barrow-in-Furness, with a ruined church
That stood beside the melancholy waves.
Then spoke King Guillaume to Sir Donald C.:
"Next session will most probably upset
The goodliest Ministry of virtuous men
Whereof this world holds record. Not for long
Shall we contrive our schemes of policy,
Meeting within the offices and halls
Of Downing Street, as in the days that were.
I perish by these voters which I make--
Although Sir Andrew says that I may live
To rule once more; but let what will be, be.
He tells me that it is not good for me
To cut down oaks at Haw'rden, as before.
Thou, therefore, take my axe Exbrummagem,
Which was my pride--for thou rememberest how
The lustiest tree would fall beneath my strokes--
But now delay not; take Exbrummagem,
And fling him overboard when out at sea."
Then bold Sir Donald took Exbrummagem,
And went, and lighted his cigar, and thought:
"And if, indeed, I cast the axe away,
Surely a precious thing, one worthy note,
Should thus be lost for ever from the earth,
Which might have pleased the eyes of many men.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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