Leaguers to right of them, Whigs on the left of them, Tories behind them, stamped, roared, and thundered, Stormed at with hoot and yell, while many a weak one fell, They that had voted well came from the lobby back, back to the House pell-mell-- All that was left of the happy three hundred. When will they e'er be paid? Oh, the grand vote they gave! Salisbury wondered! Honour the vote they gave! Long live the "Rad." Brigade! Gladstone's three hundred. 25th June, 1882. J. ARTHUR ELLIOTT. * * * * * A LAY OF THE LAW COURTS. Being the experience of Officials, Counsel, Clients, Witnesses, and all who do their business in the Great Legal Maze. With apologies to the Poet Laureate. * * * * * Up the stairs, down the stairs, Farther and farther yet; Here we come out of breath, Flustered and sundered. Barriers to right of us, Barriers to left of us, Barriers in front of us! Bad words we thundered. Most doors are barred and locked, All sense of safety shocked; Why is our business blocked By those who blundered? Back to the charge we're led; Corridors dark we tread; Had we gone heels o'er head Who could have wondered? No friend to say "Beware!" No warning, "Pray, take care!" Each step another snare! If one, there's five hundred. Ours not to make reply; Ours not to reason why; Still we may raise the cry, Some one has blundered! _Funny Folks_, 1883. * * * * * THE LATEST CHARGE. [At a meeting in Ireland recently, when Mr. Biggar got up to speak, six hundred ladies rose and quitted the room.] On their legs, on their legs, On their legs onward, All with face pale as death Rose the Six hundred. How dare he show his head? "Rush from the wretch!" they said. Straight to the street beneath Strode the Six Hundred. Forward the fair brigade, No woman there dismayed. Not though each fair one knew Biggar had blundered. His not to reason why, His not to make reply, Best take his hat and fly, When with rage out of breath Rushed the Six Hundred. Married to right of him, Single to left of him, Widows in front of him Volleyed and thundered. No storm of shot and shell E'er silenced man so well. Joe! ne'er his tale shall tell When near an Irish belle-- Noble Six Hundred! _Funny Folks_, January 1884. _The Nineteenth Century_, March 1878, contained a poem entitled-- THE REVENGE. _A Ballad of the Fleet._ I.