Who held the tempting apple nigh And always tried to make me cry, And stuck the scissors in my eye? My Brother. Who left us all on Christmas Day And to the cupboard made his way And on the tree left not a spray? My Brother. Who threw my playthings on the floor. And broke my doll behind the door, And my best ribbons always tore? My Brother. Who pinched my kitten’s ear, or tail, And ducked her in the water-pail And pinched my cheek for turning pale? My Brother. Who spilt his coffee on his lap, And tore his mother’s new lace cap, And blurred with ink my atlas map? My Brother. Who’s glad he is at school now, And not at home to make a row I know who’s happy, anyhow, His Sister. ――――:o:―――― VALENTINE. Why at my church do I select a pew, Commanding always one particular view Alas! I fear it is to look at you The Curate. When do I shun the theatre or the ball, For spinsters’ tea that’s weak, and talk that’s small ’Tis when I think it probable you’ll call Our Curate. Why, by my hands, industriously were tied The holly wreaths in church at Christmas-tide? Because I loved to labour by your side Dear Curate. And when the living fat shall fall to thee, Shall all thy flock forgotten be, Or wilt thou then begin to think of me My Curate. ――――:o:―――― MY BAEDEKER. Who teaches me to go abroad To Paris, Rome, or Venice-ward, Or Norway’s fjeld and deep fjord? My Baedeker. Who gives the annals of each nation, Maps, money, language, vegetation, And what’s about the population? My Baedeker. Who says what galleries there may be For which one pays, which open free From ten to four, or nine to three? My Baedeker. Who says what churches I’m to visit And if a picture’s framed which is it? And puts a star lest I should miss it? My Baedeker. From _Tracks in Norway_. ―――――――― Who are the anxious watchers o’er The slumbers of a little bore, That screams whene’er it doesn’t snore Why, Mothers. Whose pity wipes its piping eyes, And stills maturer childhood’s cries, Stopping its mouth with cakes and pies? Oh, Mothers! _The Humorist_, 1861. MY TUTOR. Who was’t when I came fresh from School Up here, was so polite and cool, And showed me each Collegiate rule? My Tutor.