A simple creature Gaffer Jones, A Court he never saw; An income adequate he owns; What should he know of Law? He had a quiet stupid air, And he was richly clad; I thought if he’s got cash to spare, ’Tis easy to be had. A suit I heard was ’gainst him brought, Which must expensive be. “Expense!” he cried; Pooh pooh, ’tis nought; I’m only a trustee.” “But how is that? I pray you tell.” He answered, “Don’t you see? I’d got some property to sell―― Only as a trustee. “Two purchasers they did apply, Whilst, to prevent all bother, When one hung back I by and by Concluded with the other. “The first from Chancery got a writ, And served it straight on me; But why am I to care a bit?―― I’m only a trustee.” “You say in Chancery you are thrown; Great the expense will be; And since the fault has been your own, The costs will fall on thee.” Then did the simpleton reply, “’Tis true the first vendee Has filed a bill――I can’t tell why―― I’m only a trustee.” “You’re in a mess, my little man, As sure as you’re alive, Unless to hit upon a plan For safety you contrive.” “You’re rather green, it may be seen,” The silly man replied; The purchase-money paid has been. The fund I did divide; “And when I’d parted with it, Sir, Another suit they brought; Because, they said, I’d sold it for Less money than I ought. “First, the original vendee Had filed a bill to say, His purchase-money paid would be, Upon a certain day. “But as it happen’d, I’d been paid By number two, and I To him had the estate consign’d, Passing the first one by: “And as I did not better know With whom I ought to side, I’ve let the money from me go―― The fund I did divide. “So the executors have brought An action ’gainst me, too, Yet I’ve proceeded as I thought ’Twere best for me to do.” “How many suits must you defend, In numbers odd or even?” Said he, “To say I can’t pretend: I think, though, there are seven. “But then, you know, you’ll understand It matters not to me; For though no fund I’ve got in hand, I still am a trustee.” “The cash is gone, the suits run on, Each day requires a fee!” ’Twas waste of argument, for still He said, “I’ve not to pay a bill, I’m only a trustee.” ―――― ONLY SEVEN. _A Pastoral Story, after Wordsworth._ I marvell’d why a simple child, That lightly draws its breath, Should utter groans so very wild, And look as pale as Death. Adopting a parental tone, I ask’d her why she cried; The damsel answer’d, with a groan, “I’ve got a pain inside! “I thought it would have sent me mad Last night about eleven;” Said I, “What is it makes you bad? How many apples have you had?” She answer’d, “Only seven!”