“And now, to sift the monstrous drift, Committees are enrolled, And they must hear each councillere His brief at length unfold. “With weary head, from A to Z―― I trow it was no play―― The members sat, to be argued at, From eleven till four each day. “Committees here, Committees there, Committees all around; While counsel roared, and joked, and bored, And fought, and fumed, and frowned. “Ten guas. per day, and ten briefs alway, Unto my share there came; One half, I knew, I could not do, But I took them all the same. “And I grew rich, and behaved as sich, And never the tide did drop, And the duns had flown that I once had known On my staircase for hours to stop. “And my lanky bag did swell and swag With the freight of briefs it bore; I new curled my wig, and in letters big Wrote ‘Committee’ on my door. “Twelve briefs one day on my table lay, With heavy retainers on each, When a knock at the door ushered in one more, My attention to beseech.” “Now save thee, seedy Barristere, And send thee quick relief! Why look’st thou so?” “Ah, shame and woe! I did refuse that brief!” PART II. “The Market now grew rather stiff, And shares not quite so free; Many Directors went abroad, And many an Allottee. “And briefs fell slack, and no more at our back The agents in crowds did follow, Nor ten times a day, with papers or pay, Came to the Barrister’s hollo! “I had done what was quite irregular, And it would work them grief, For all averred that the worst had occurred Since I refused the brief, ‘Ah, wretch!’ said they, ‘to turn away The fee upon a brief!’ “The Panic grew, the bills came due, Directors crossed the sea; Who knows which first of the bubbles burst? They went, and so did we. “Down dropt our work, our fees dropt down: ’Twas bad as bad could be; Not once a week had we to speak Upon a Committee. “All in the hot Committee-rooms The Barristeres, at noon Must yawn, and linger round the doors, Or thro’ the lobbies moon. “Day after day we pined away, So idle you’ve no notion; As idle as a long debate Upon an Irish motion. “Business, business, everywhere―― The Courts it seemed to fill; Business, business, everywhere, But not one Railway Bill! “Yea, even young men just called――oh dear, That such things e’er should be!―― By mere half-guinea motions made A better thing than we! “About, about, in busy rout, Attorneys and Q.C.’s, Within our sight were paying down And pocketing of fees! “Ah! well a-day! what evil looks Had I from old and young! And, for starched kerchief, the rejected brief About my neck was hung. “Farewell, farewell; but this I tell―― As sure as there thou’rt set, He best shall thrive who most shall strive To keep all he can get.