Peck's Bad Boy and His Pa: 1883Peck, George W. (George Wilbur)
General
Peck's Bad Boy and His Pa: 1883
Peck, George W. (George Wilbur)
American wit and humor; Boys -- Fiction; Practical jokes -- Fiction
“No deviltry, just a little fun. You see, Ma went to Chicago to stay a
week, and she got tired, and telegraphed she would be home last night,
and Pa was down town and I forgot to give him the dispatch, and after he
went to bed, me and a chum of mine thought wo would have a 4th of July.
“You see, my chum has got a sister about as big as Ma, and we hooked some
of her clothes and after P got to snoring we put them in Pa's room. O,
you'd a laffed. We put a pair of number one slippers with blue
stockings, down in front of the rocking chair, beside Pa's boots, and a
red corset on a chair, and my chum's sister's best black silk dress on
another chair, and a hat with a white feather on, on the bureau, and some
frizzes on the gas bracket, and everything we could find that belonged
to a girl in my mum's sister's room. O, we got a red parasol too, and
left it right in the middle of the floor. Well, when I looked at the
lay-out, and heard Pa snoring, I thought I should die. You see, Ma knows
Pa is, a darn good feller, but she is easily excited. My chum slept with
me that night, and when we heard the door bell ring I stuffed a pillow
in my mouth, There was nobody to meet Ma at the depot, and she hired a
hack and came right up. Nobody heard the bell but me, and I had to go
down and let Ma in. She was pretty hot, now you bet, at not being met
at the depot. “Where's your father?” said she, as she began to go up
stairs.
“I told her I guessed Pa had gone to sleep by this time, but I heard
a good deal of noise in the room about an hour ago, and may be he was
taking a bath. Then I slipped up stairs and looked over the banisters.
Ma said something about heavens and earth, and where is the huzzy, and
a lot of things I couldn't hear, and Pa said damfino and its no such
thing, and the door slammed and they talked for two hours. I s'pose
they finally layed it to me, as they always do, 'cause Pa called me very
early this morning, and when I came down stairs he came out in the hall
and his face was redder'n a beet, and he tried to stab me with his big
toe-nail, and if it hadn't been for these pieces of brick he would have
hurt my feelings. I see they had my chum's sister's clothes all pinned
up in a newspaper, and I s'pose when I go back I shall have to carry
them home, and then she will be down on me. I'll tell you what, I have
got a good notion to take some shoemaker's wax and stick my chum on
my back and travel with a circus as a double headed boy from Borneo. A
fellow could have more fun, and not get kicked all the time.”
And the boy sampled some strawberries in a case in front of the store
and went down the street whistling for his chum, who was looking out of
an alley to see if the coast was clear.
CHAPTER VI.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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