Peck's Bad Boy and His Pa: 1883Peck, George W. (George Wilbur)
General
Peck's Bad Boy and His Pa: 1883
Peck, George W. (George Wilbur)
American wit and humor; Boys -- Fiction; Practical jokes -- Fiction
“Well, my chum and me practiced with that goat until he could bunt the
picture of a goat every time. We borried a buck beer sign from a saloon
man and hung it on the back of a chair, and the goat would hit it every
time. That night Pa wanted to know what we were doing up in my room, and
I told him we were playing lodge, and improving our minds, and Pa said
that was right, there was nothing that did boys of our age half so much
good as to imitate men, and store by useful nollidge. Then my chum asked
Pa if he didn't want to come up and take the grand bumper degree, and Pa
laffed and said he didn't care if he did, just to encourage us boys in
innocent pastime, that was so improving to our intellex.
“We had shut the goat up in a closet in my room, and he had got over
blatting, so we took off the handkerchief, and he was eating some of my
paper collars, and skate straps. We went up stairs, and told Pa to come
up pretty soon and give three distinct raps, and when we asked him who
comes there he must say, 'a pilgrim who wants to join your ancient order
and ride the goat.' Ma wanted to come up too, but we told her if she
come in it would break up the lodge, cause a woman couldn't keep a
secret, and we didn't have any side saddle for the goat. Say, if you
never tried it, the next time you nitiate a man in your Mason's lodge
you sprinkle a little kyan pepper on the goat's beard just afore you
turn him loose. You can get three times as much fun to the square inch
of goat. You wouldn't think it was the same goat. Well, we got all fixed
and Pa rapped, and we let him in and told him he must be blindfolded,
and he got on his knees a laffing and I tied a towel around his eyes,
and then I turned him around and made him get down on his hands also,
and then his back was right towards the closet door, and I put the buck
beer sign right against Pa's clothes. He was a laffing all the time, and
said we boys were as full of fun as they made 'em, and we told him
it was a solemn occasion, and we wouldn't permit no levity, and if he
didn't stop laffing we couldn't give him the grand bumper degree.”
[Illustration: Then everything was ready p093]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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