Peck's Sunshine: Being a Collection of Articles Written for Peck's Sun,; Milwaukee, Wis. - 1882Peck, George W. (George Wilbur)
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Peck's Sunshine: Being a Collection of Articles Written for Peck's Sun,; Milwaukee, Wis. - 1882
Peck, George W. (George Wilbur)
American wit and humor
“This seal ring on my finger caught in her frizzes and I'll be cussed if
the whole top of her head didn't come off. I was a little flurried and
went to the door, and a chambermaid was there with an armful of towels
and she handed me a couple and went off. My wife came into camp again,
and began to cry and accuse me of pulling her hair, when I went up to
her and put my arm around her waist, and was just going to kiss her,
just as any man would be justified in kissing his wife under the
circumstances, when she screamed murder and fell against the bureau.
“I looked around and the door had opened, and there was a colored man
coming into the room with a kerosene lamp, and he chuckled and said he
begged my pardon. Now, I am a man that don't let my temper get away with
me, but as it was three hours before dark I didn't see what was the use
of a lamp, and I told him to get out of there. Before 6 o'clock that
evening there had been twenty raps at the door, and we got sick. My
wife said she would not stay in that house for a million dollars. So we
started for Milwaukee.
“I tried to get a little sleep on the cars, but every little while a
conductor would wake me up and roll me over in the seat to look at my
ticket, and brake-men would run against my legs in the aisle of the car,
and shout the names of stations till I was sorry I ever left home. Now,
I want to have rest and quietude. Can I have it here?”
The manager told him to go to his room, and if he wanted any coal or ice
water to ring for it, and if anybody knocked at his door without being
sent for, to begin shooting bullets through the door. That settled
it, and when the parties returned to Iowa they said this country was a
mighty sight different from Dubuque.
THE GIDDY GIRLS QUARREL.
A dispatch from Brooklyn states that at the conclusion of a performance
at the theatre, Fanny Davenport's wardrobe was attached by Anna
Dickinson and the remark is made that Fanny will contest the matter.
Well, we should think she would. What girl would sit down silently and
allow another to attach her wardrobe without contesting? It is no light
thing for an actress to have her wardrobe attached after the theatre is
out. Of course Fanny could throw something over her, a piece of
scenery, or a curtain, and go to her hotel, but how would she look? Miss
Davenport always looked well with her wardrobe on, but it may have been
all in the wardrobe. Without a wardrobe she may look very plain and
unattractive.
Anna Dickinson has done very wrong. She has struck Fanny in a vital
part. An actress with a wardrobe is one of the noblest works of nature.
She is the next thing to an honest man, which is the noblest work,
though we do not say it boastingly. We say she is next to an honest man,
with a wardrobe, but if she has no wardrobe it is not right.
However, we will change the subject before it gets too deep for us.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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