It stands a thing strangest of all, how differently one will regard
another when the time is this or that. Peg, as I have written, would
seem ever to me the rompish child; for my thoughts of her were forged
and beaten out upon the stithy of those moments when, free and playful
and without restraint, she sat alone with me. By the same token! I
recall another score of moments where the stage was a drawing room and
strange folk framed the scene, and Peg, a beautiful woman of dignity and
grave reserve, would remind one of no child at all. But then she would
not be Peg to me; on such times when this proud, sufficient being made
me some sweeping, stately recognition, and as though I had known her
but a day, I have stood aside to wonder was she that playful leopard Peg
whose white mark I wore on my hand? Was it she to call me “slave” and
kiss the mark, or “watch-dog” and make me a collar with her arms? And
still I liked her thus. I was proud to see her proud; and my bosom would
swell to note how when Peg, fastidious, and with her highbred look,
stepped across a room, she seemed among the women gathered there--and
they the Vere de Veres--a greyhound among poodles, or rather the leopard
she was among a troop of tabbies. These be crude comparisons, surely;
yet there comes no other to so fit with my thoughts of rearward days
when Peg moved an empress in the midst of peasants, at once the envy and
despair of rivalry.
As I tell you, for all these exhibitions of commanding womanhood, Peg
would continue with me but a child; the image of such ballroom triumphs
were not to remain with me, while the real Peg, the true Peg, the
dear Peg of memory when alone, would ever be the laughing, mocking,
hectoring, teasing Peg on her leathern throne at my desk's end. It is
the same with men; there come such words as play and work, and danger
and safety; and the man you saw on the battle-line, as stern and as
brave as Caesar, is that boy by yonder campfire who now laughs over
some tale of personal chicken-pillage when he fled before a mad old dame
armed of a pudding stick.
While Peg and I were on these long-range terms, I went more in hunt of
the General for his company's sake and for conversation. I do not think
the General stood aware of Peg's cold pose towards me, for, as I have
urged, he was no one to see such things; besides, Peg, who showed
herself no bad strategist, would be about me with the friendliness of
those days that were, whenever the General sat by to make a third. Peg
held the General in a best esteem; and then, too, she would be mindful
how lately he was ill and save for her tending might have died, and be
the last to vex him with thoughts of how two so near him and dear upon
his sentiment nourished a feud among themselves.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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