"You'd better not now."
"Yes, I'm going to, now. I've got to. Then I'll never say another
word--I'll go away, and never say another word." Thomas got up, and
brought his chair close to Charlotte's. "Don't move away," he
pleaded; "let me sit here near you once--I never shall again. I'm
going to tell you, Charlotte. I used to look across at you sitting
in the meeting-house, Sabbath days, when I was a boy, and think you
were the handsomest girl I ever saw. Then I did try to go with you
once before I went to college; perhaps you didn't know that I meant
anything, but I did. Barney was in the way then a little, but I
didn't think much of it. I didn't know that he really meant to go
with you. You let me go home with you two or three times--perhaps you
remember."
Charlotte nodded.
"I never forgot," said Thomas Payne. "Well, father found it out, and
he had a talk with me. He made me promise to wait till I got through
college before I said anything to you; he was doing a good deal for
me, you know. So I waited, and the first thing I knew, when I came
home, they said Barney Thayer was waiting on you, and I thought it
was all settled and there was nothing more to be done. I made up my
mind to bear it like a man and make the best of it, and I did. But
this spring when I was through college, and that happened betwixt you
and Barney, when he--didn't come back to you, and you didn't seem to
mind so much, I couldn't help having a little hope. I waited and
kept thinking he'd make up with you, but he didn't, and I knew how
determined he was. Then finally I began to make a few advances,
but--well, it's all over now, Charlotte. There's only one thing I'd
like to ask: if I hadn't waited, as I promised father, would it have
made any difference? Did you always like Barney Thayer?"
"Yes; it wouldn't have made any difference," Charlotte said. There
were tears in her eyes.
Thomas Payne arose. "Then that is all," said he. "I never had any
chance, if I had only known. I've got nothing more to say. I want to
thank you for asking me to come here to-night and telling me. It was
a good deal kinder than to let me keep on coming. That would have
been rather hard on a fellow." Thomas Payne fairly laughed, although
his handsome face was white. "I hope it will all come right betwixt
you and Barney, Charlotte," he said, "and don't you worry about me, I
shall get on. I'll own this seems a little harder than it was before,
but I shall get on." Thomas brushed his bell hat carefully with his
cambric handkerchief, and stowed it under his arm. "Good-bye,
Charlotte," said he, in his old gay voice; "when you ask me, I'll
come and dance at your wedding."
Charlotte got up, trembling. Thomas reached out his hand and touched
her smooth fair head softly. "I never touched you nor kissed you,
except in games like that Copenhagen to-day," said he; "but I've
thought of it a good many times."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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