Penelope : $b or, Love's labour lost. A novel. Volume 1 (of 3)Scargill, William Pitt
General
Penelope : $b or, Love's labour lost. A novel. Volume 1 (of 3)
Scargill, William Pitt
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
The worthy magistrate was going on, but his indignation at the shocking
violation of those most excellent laws which the wisdom of our
ancestors has formed, and the folly of their descendants has tolerated,
so entirely overcame his feelings, that in the violence of his anger
he incurred the penalty of five shillings; but his companions did not
inform against him. In a word, he swore most bitterly and tremendously.
Our readers must not blame him too hastily for this transgression.
Let them consider that he was a magistrate, and of course very zealous
for the due observance of the laws. Swearing is certainly wrong; but
that is a mere trifle compared to poaching: the uttering of a single
profane oath being, in the eye of our most excellent laws, precisely
one-twentieth part of the crime of an unqualified person having in his
possession a dead partridge.
When the baronet had relieved his bursting heart, and vented his
swelling indignation in the mode above named, and when Colonel Crop had
sympathetically joined him in the execration of the transgressors of
our most excellent and equal laws which regard the arrangement of game,
then did Sir George proceed:
“Could you believe it, Spoonbill?--You know the pains I have taken with
that wood--I say, could you believe it, after all the expense I have
been at about it--after having six men sitting up night after night to
watch it, that in one afternoon, and that in broad daylight, it should
be almost cleared by those infernal villains?”
Here the baronet became angry again, and no wonder; it was beyond
all endurance. Not only did he as a magistrate feel grieved at the
violation of the laws, but as a gentleman and a man he was pained at
the loss of those birds which he seemed born to shoot. The birds were
gone and the poachers were gone; the first he could not shoot, and the
last he could not commit. And what is the use of living in the country,
if there are no birds to be shot and no poachers to be sent to gaol?
Pitying the sorrows of the magistrate, Colonel Crop replied, “Too bad,
’pon my honor.”
But Lord Spoonbill having recently quitted the university, in which he
had been taught to investigate and seek out the connection of cause and
effect, enquired:--
“But how could the rascals do all this without being detected, if you
had men to keep the wood by night and day?”
“I will tell you,” said the baronet, whose violence seemed a little
abated by the kind sympathy of his friends: “it was entirely owing to a
rascally gamekeeper of mine, who, no longer ago than last Sunday week,
instead of attending to his duty, must needs go sneaking to church. I
saw the fellow there myself. He absolutely had the impudence to come
into church when he knew I was there. I dismissed him however at a
short notice. I was determined to have no church-going gamekeepers.”
“That going to church was abominable,” said the colonel.
“But I thought you had always guns in your plantations, Sir George?”
said Lord Spoonbill.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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