Penelope's English Experiences: Being Extracts from the Commonplace Book of Penelope Hamilton — John Shaqi
Penelope's English Experiences: Being Extracts from the Commonplace Book of Penelope HamiltonWiggin, Kate Douglas Smith
General
Penelope's English Experiences: Being Extracts from the Commonplace Book of Penelope Hamilton
Wiggin, Kate Douglas Smith
Americans -- England -- Fiction; England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
Sometimes we sally forth in search of adventures in the thick of a
'London particular,' Mr. Guppy's phrase for a fog. When you are once
ensconced in your garden seat by the driver, you go lumbering through
a world of bobbing shadows, where all is weird, vague, grey, dense; and
where great objects loom up suddenly in the mist and then disappear;
where the sky, heavy and leaden, seems to descend bodily upon your head,
and the air is full of a kind of luminous yellow smoke.
A Lipton's Tea 'bus is the only one we can see plainly in this sort
of weather, and so we always take it. I do not wish, however, to be
followed literally in these modest suggestions for omnibus rides,
because I am well aware that they are not sufficiently specific for the
ordinary tourist who wishes to see London systematically and without any
loss of time. If you care to go to any particular place, or reach that
place by any particular time, you must not, of course, look at the most
conspicuous signs on the tops and ends of the chariots as we do; you
must stand quietly at one of the regular points of departure and try to
decipher, in a narrow horizontal space along the side, certain little
words that show the route and destination of the vehicle. They say
that it can be done, and I do not feel like denying it on my own
responsibility. Old Londoners assert that they are not blinded or
confused by Pears' Soap in letters two feet high, scarlet on a gold
ground, but can see below in fine print, and with the naked eye,
such legends as Tottenham Court Road, Westbourne Grove, St. Pancras,
Paddington, or Victoria. It is certainly reasonable that the omnibuses
should be decorated to suit the inhabitants of the place rather than
foreigners, and it is perhaps better to carry a few hundred stupid souls
to the wrong station daily than to allow them to cleanse their hands
with the wrong soap, or quench their thirst with the wrong (which is to
say the unadvertised) beverage.
The conductors do all in their power to mitigate the lot of unhappy
strangers, and it is only now and again that you hear an absent-minded
or logical one call out, 'Castoria! all the w'y for a penny.'
We claim for our method of travelling, not that it is authoritative, but
that it is simple--suitable to persons whose desires are flexible and
whose plans are not fixed. It has its disadvantages, which may indeed
be said of almost anything. For instance, we had gone for two successive
mornings on a Cadbury's Cocoa 'bus to Francesca's dressmaker in
Kensington. On the third morning, deceived by the ambitious and
unscrupulous Cadbury, we mounted it and journeyed along comfortably
three miles to the east of Kensington before we discovered our mistake.
It was a pleasant and attractive neighbourhood where we found ourselves,
but unfortunately Francesca's dressmaker did not reside there.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account