Civilization, Western -- Fiction; France -- Civilization -- Fiction; Penguins -- Fiction; Satire
“That is what I meant. There are some adapted ones. So much the better.
As proofs, forged documents, in general, are better than genuine ones,
first of all because they have been expressly made to suit the needs of
the case, to order and measure, and therefore they are fitting and
exact. They are also preferable because they carry the mind into an
ideal world and turn it aside from the reality which, alas! in this
world is never without some alloy. . . . Nevertheless, I think I should
have preferred, Panther, that we had no proofs at all.”
The first act of the Anti-Pyrotist Association was to ask the
Government immediately to summon the seven hundred Pyrotists and their
accomplices before the High Court of Justice as guilty of high treason.
Prince des Boscénos was charged to speak on behalf of the Association
and presented himself before the Council which had assembled to hear
him. He expressed a hope that the vigilance and firmness of the
Government would rise to the height of the occasion. He shook hands
with each of the ministers and as he passed General Greatauk he
whispered in his ear:
“Behave properly, you ruffian, or I will publish the Maloury
_dossier!_”
Some days later by a unanimous vote of both Houses, on a motion
proposed by the Government, the Anti-Pyrotist Association was granted a
charter recognising it as beneficial to the public interest.
The Association immediately sent a deputation to Chitterlings Castle in
Porpoisia, where Crucho was eating the bitter bread of exile, to assure
the prince of the love and devotion of the Anti-Pyrotist members.
However, the Pyrotists grew in numbers, and now counted ten thousand.
They had their regular cafés on the boulevards. The patriots had theirs
also, richer and bigger, and every evening glasses of beer, saucers,
match-stands, jugs, chairs, and tables were hurled from one to the
other. Mirrors were smashed to bits, and the police ended the struggles
by impartially trampling the combatants of both parties under their
hob-nailed shoes.
On one of these glorious nights, as Prince des Boscénos was leaving a
fashionable café in the company of some patriots, M. de La Trumelle
pointed out to him a little, bearded man with glasses, hatless, and
having only one sleeve to his coat, who was painfully dragging himself
along the rubbish-strewn pavement.
“Look!” said he, “there is Colomban!”
The prince had gentleness as well as strength; he was exceedingly mild;
but at the name of Colomban his blood boiled. He rushed at the little
spectacled man, and knocked him down with one blow of his fist on the
nose.
M. de La Trumelle then perceived that, misled by an undeserved
resemblance, he had mistaken for Colomban, M. Bazile, a retired lawyer,
the secretary of the Anti-pyrotist Association, and an ardent and
generous patriot. Prince des Boscénos was one of those antique souls
who never bend. However, he knew how to recognise his faults.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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