`Mr O'Brien, who joined the ship about an hour since.' `Don't you know better than to sit upon a gun?' said the captain. `To be sure I do,' replied I, `when there's anything better to sit upon.' `He knows no better, sir,' observed the first lieutenant. `Then he must be taught,' replied the captain. `Mr O'Brien, since you have perched yourself on that gun to please yourself, you will now continue there for two hours to please me. Do you understand, sir? you'll ride on that gun for two hours.' `I understand, sir,' replied I; `but I am afraid that he won't move without spurs, although there's plenty of _metal_ in him.' The captain turned away and laughed as he went into his cabin, and all the officers laughed, and I laughed too, for I perceived no great hardship in sitting down an hour or two, any more than I do now. Well, I soon found that, like a young bear, all my troubles were to come. "I got into a scrape just before we left harbour. It was my watch when they piped to dinner, and I took the liberty to run below, as my messmates had a knack of forgetting absent friends. Well, the captain came on board, and there were no side boys, no side ropes, and no officers to receive him, he came on deck foaming with rage, for his dignity was hurt, and he inquired who was the midshipman of the watch. `Mr O'Brien,' said they all. `Devil a bit,' replied I, `it was my forenoon watch.' `Who relieved you, sir?' said the first lieutenant. `Devil a soul, sir,' replied I; `for they were all too busy with their pork and beef.' `Then why did you leave the deck without relief?' `Because, sir, my stomach would have had but little relief if I had remained.' The captain, who stood by, said, `Do you see those cross-trees, sir?' `Is it those little bits of wood that you mane, on the top there, captain?' `Yes, sir; now just go up there and stay until I call you down: You must be brought up to your senses, young man, or you'll have but little prospect in the service.' `I've an idea that I'll have plenty of prospect when I get up there,' replied I, `but it's all to please you.' So up I went, as I have many a time since, and as you often will, Peter, just to enjoy the fresh air and your own pleasant thoughts, all at one and the same time.