Petty Troubles of Married Life, CompleteBalzac, Honoré de
General
Petty Troubles of Married Life, Complete
Balzac, Honoré de
Marriage
You think a good deal of this horse; your consider him an excellent one
and he cost you twelve hundred francs. When a man has the honor of being
the father of a family, he thinks as much of twelve hundred francs as
you think of this horse. You see at once the frightful amount of your
extra expenses, in case Coco should have to lie by. For two days you
will have to take hackney coaches to go to your business. You wife will
pout if she can’t go out: but she will go out, and take a carriage. The
horse will cause the purchase of numerous extras, which you will find
in your coachman’s bill,--your only coachman, a model coachman, whom you
watch as you do a model anybody.
To these thoughts you give expression in the gentle movement of the whip
as it falls upon the animal’s ribs, up to his knees in the black dust
which lines the road in front of La Verrerie.
At this moment, little Adolphe, who doesn’t know what to do in this
rolling box, has sadly twisted himself up into a corner, and his
grandmother anxiously asks him, “What is the matter?”
“I’m hungry,” says the child.
“He’s hungry,” says the mother to her daughter.
“And why shouldn’t he be hungry? It is half-past five, we are not at the
barrier, and we started at two!”
“Your husband might have treated us to dinner in the country.”
“He’d rather make his horse go a couple of leagues further, and get back
to the house.”
“The cook might have had the day to herself. But Adolphe is right, after
all: it’s cheaper to dine at home,” adds the mother-in-law.
“Adolphe,” exclaims your wife, stimulated by the word “cheaper,” “we
go so slow that I shall be seasick, and you keep driving right in this
nasty dust. What are you thinking of? My gown and hat will be ruined!”
“Would you rather ruin the horse?” you ask, with the air of a man who
can’t be answered.
“Oh, no matter for your horse; just think of your son who is dying
of hunger: he hasn’t tasted a thing for seven hours. Whip up your old
horse! One would really think you cared more for your nag than for your
child!”
You dare not give your horse a single crack with the whip, for he might
still have vigor enough left to break into a gallop and run away.
“No, Adolphe tries to vex me, he’s going slower,” says the young wife to
her mother. “My dear, go as slow as you like. But I know you’ll say I am
extravagant when you see me buying another hat.”
Upon this you utter a series of remarks which are lost in the racket
made by the wheels.
“What’s the use of replying with reasons that haven’t got an ounce of
common-sense?” cries Caroline.
You talk, turning your face to the carriage and then turning back to the
horse, to avoid an accident.
“That’s right, run against somebody and tip us over, do, you’ll be rid
of us. Adolphe, your son is dying of hunger. See how pale he is!”
“But Caroline,” puts in the mother-in-law, “he’s doing the best he can.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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