Having received my assurance, the officer apologised for troubling me
and withdrew, and I was left alone with my thoughts. Deep down in my
heart there was the desire to hasten after him and to tell him that not
only I had lied to him, but that it was possible for me to make amends
by putting him on the track of the man who, I felt morally certain, was
the criminal. The wish, however, was scarcely born before it was dragged
down and stifled by that same irresistible force I have described a few
lines since. It seemed to me I was bound hand and foot, powerless to
help myself and incapable of doing aught save carry out the will of the
remorseless being into whose power I had fallen so completely. But had I
really so fallen? Could it be possible that such power was permitted to
a human being? No, no--a thousand times no! If he had that influence he
must be an agent of the Evil One, whose mission it was to draw to
perdition the souls of helpless men. Filled with shame, I sank into a
chair and covered my face with my hands, as if by so doing I could shut
out the horrible thoughts that filled my brain. Could it be true that I,
who had always regarded a liar as the most despicable of men, had sunk
so low as to become one myself? God help me! God pity me! Of all the
bitter hours my life has known, I think that moment was the worst.
For some time after the inspector had taken his departure I sat, as I
have said, my face covered with my hands, trying to think coherently.
Twenty-four hours before I had been one of the happiest men in England.
Nothing had troubled me. I had lived _for_ my art and _in_ my art, and I
believe I can confidently say that I had not an enemy in the world. Now,
in a single hour, my whole life was changed. I had been drawn into the
toils of a fiend in human shape and I was paying the awful penalty.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account