Phil Purcel, The Pig-Driver; The Geography Of An Irish Oath; The Lianhan Shee: Traits And Stories Of The Irish Peasantry, The Works of; William Carleton, Volume Three — John Shaqi
Phil Purcel, The Pig-Driver; The Geography Of An Irish Oath; The Lianhan Shee: Traits And Stories Of The Irish Peasantry, The Works of; William Carleton, Volume ThreeCarleton, William
General
Phil Purcel, The Pig-Driver; The Geography Of An Irish Oath; The Lianhan Shee: Traits And Stories Of The Irish Peasantry, The Works of; William Carleton, Volume Three
Carleton, William
Ireland -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
Phil, however, with an assumed air of simplicity absolutely stupid,
disposed of them to a Yorkshire dealer at about twice the value they
would have brought in Ireland, though as pigs went in England it was low
enough. He declared that they had been fed on tip-top feeding: which was
literally true, as he afterwards admitted that the tops of nettles and
potato stalks constituted the only nourishment they had got for three
weeks before.
The Yorkshireman looked with great contempt upon what he considered a
miserable essay to take him in.
“What a fule this Hirishmun mun bea;” said he, “to think to teake me
in! Had he said that them there Hirish swoine were badly feade, I'd
ha' thought it fairish enough on un; but to seay that they was oll weal
feade on tip-top feeadin'! Nea, nea! I knaws weal enough that they
was noat feade on nothin' at oll, which meakes them loak so poorish!
Howsomever, I shall fatten them. I'se warrant--I'se warrant I shall!”
When driven home to sties somewhat more comfortable than the cabins of
unfortunate Irishmen, they were well supplied with food which would have
been very often considered a luxury by poor Paddy himself, much less by
his pigs.
“Measter,” said the man who had seen them fed, “them there Hirish pigs
ha' not feasted nout for a moonth yet: they feade like nout I seed o' my
laife!!”
“Ay! ay!” replied the master, “I'se warrant they'll soon fatten--I'se
warrant they shall, Hodge--they be praime feeders--I'se warrant they
shall; and then, Hodge, we've bit the soft Hirishmun.”
Hodge gave a knowing look at his master, and grinned at this
observation.
The next morning Hodge repaired to the sties to see how they were
thriving; when, to his great consternation, he found the feeding-troughs
clean as if they had been washed, and, not a single Irish pig to be seen
or heard about the premises; but to what retreat the animals could
have betaken themselves, was completely beyond his comprehension. He
scratched his head, and looked about him in much perplexity.
“Dang un!” he exclaimed, “I never seed nout like this.”
He would have proceeded in a strain of cogitation equally enlightened,
had not a noise of shouting, alarm, and confusion in the neighborhood,
excited his attention. He looked about him, and to his utter
astonishment saw that some extraordinary commotion prevailed, that the
country was up, and the hills alive with people, who ran, and shouted,
and wheeled at full flight in all possible directions. His first object
was to join the crowd, which he did as soon as possible, and found that
the pigs he had shut up the preceding night in sties whose enclosures
were at least four feet high, had cleared them like so many chamois, and
were now closely pursued by the neighbors, who rose _en masse_ to hunt
down and secure such dreadful depredators.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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